Dear, The Past

i could have swore id whiped this slate clean.
i could have sworn youd know what id mean.
when i said your mine you will be forever.
when i said lets do this ill make myself better.
but for me to get better it took getting worse.
what i wanted became nothing more than a curse.
that would burden my life day after day.
but the ashes you have are pages i left astray.
there still there wandering lurking my mind.
still there today after quite some time.
they were written true and meaningful then.
they were written when i lived, how i remember when.
id laughed and loved lived in the moment.
but my free way of living now left just broken.
this storys been told more than once you see.
but still to this day only written by me.
never once have you said i miss those times.
and if you did now it'd probably be lies.
so why waste this breath and let these tears air dry.
cuz its all i have left, and they leave a sparkle in my eye.
so i may seem happy with a lot left to live.
but im lying here broken, nothing to give.
remember that boy that you once knew?
who was happy as long he was holding you.
well hes still alive just bettered himself.
hes the one who wrote you this letter and well.
i hope you read this thoroughly and know.
theres still room here for that boy to grow.
and rebuild what he feels and what youd once felt.
so heres my return adress, My Own Living Hell