The monster

I'm told of a monster that lives on this earth,

capable of mass death and destruction,

able to rip up the earth with one swipe of its great talons.

It can travel hundreds of miles, in just a few hours.

We should be fearful of the monster,

with its great strength and intelligence,

no army is strong enough to stop it,

even with all the guns,bullets and bombs we have,

no one is powerful enough to stop it.

we all have seen the monster that lives on the earth,

he is not hiding.

We just need to look 

in the mirror. 

Reviews

[A.Tarek]

Indeed,
Humans are to be feared when they let their greed an desire out of control.
Enjoyed that

[Taniska 😊€..]

I think you are telling about the humans.who use to hide their monster habits from the world. Good ,I like it keep writing ((smiles))😊😊😊😊

[H L Rose]

I am a total fan of this sentiment. I wrote a poem with a similar sentiment recently. I enjoy the writing as well. I do have a few suggestions on condensing the poem if you don’t mind me sharing.

“I'm told of a monster that lives on this earth,”
I like this line cause I feel like it draws me in right from the start. I might suggest Turing “that lives” into one, more intense word like “dwelling” or “skulking”. Just a suggestion.

“capable of mass death and destruction,”
I like this line. I don’t know if you need “death” though. I think it may flow better with just “capable of mass destruction”.

“able to rip up the earth with one swipe of its great talons.”
This line definitely begins to get the grandeur of this monster across. Since the rest of the line describes the impressive nature of the monster and it’s talons I’m not sure if “great” is needed.

“It can travel hundreds of miles, in just a few hours.”
I like this detail and also the way this line flows.

“We should be fearful of the monster,”
It’s interesting how this line warns the reader to be fearful. It implies that perhaps the reader isn’t careful enough or is deceived and doesn’t understand even though the monster has so many terrifying abilities. I’m not sure if “of this monster” is needed. I think the idea comes across without it.

“with its great strength and intelligence,”
I think this line is good. I bet you could find a more interesting word to use in place of “great”.

“no army is strong enough to stop it,”
Another great detail!

“even with all the guns,bullets and bombs we have,”
I’m a total champion of the Oxford comma, but that’s just being nit picky so don’t mind me. I like the alliteration!

“no one is powerful enough to stop it.”
Not sure about the repetition of “stop it”, but I could be wrong.

“we all have seen the monster that lives on the earth,”
Not sure if “that lives on this earth” is necessary.

“he is not hiding.”
Definitely a fan of this detail. It’s give a tense feel.

“We just need to look
in the mirror.”
Love the ending.

Once again I really like the sentiment and am a fan of the poem. Of course I could have no idea what I’m talking about so you can take my advice or leave it!

I enjoyed reading!

[Wyrn Tiger]

I will take your advice , as always thank you for your time.

[Wyrn Tiger]

I wish I had your ability to take apart a story or poem and make it seem worth more.

[H L Rose]

“Seem”? anyone’s words are worth a lot and I mean it when I say I enjoyed reading these words. Always a pleasure

[Wyrn Tiger]

thank you, love your work too.:)

[H L Rose]

Thanks! 😆

[Effie]

This is so true. We are able to destroy the most precious of living things and all we need to do is open our mouth. Very thought provoking and well written. Well done.