A cancer survivor : My Mother

Posted Date: : Nov 15, 2009 3:41 PM

Let's go back to year 2000

The year when I was young and random
I got home from school quite exhausted
Tired from the kids making fun of me
Ashamed because not a soul accepted what I became to be
My parents sat my brother and I down on the couch
We wondered what lecture they were about to touch
I was a little scared and such..

Father explained how mommy was sick
But not the normal sickness that keep you in bed
This is what he said...
"Mommy will have to keep going back to the hospital"
I saw mommy getting a little uncomfortable
"Mommy has breast cancer, but it was caught at the right time".
Then a lot of things started running on my mind..
Cancer meant death to me...
"Is mommy going to die?"
" No, she will just go through surgery and some chemo"
he said..
" She will be O.K for all that we know".

So, I was lost..
With confusion
I was too young to even ask questions
This is when I started new relations..
Relationships with people I didn't know.
I just wanted anyone to hear me out
I didn't want to keep a frown
I remember waking up to my mom's gags
She would be in the bathroom for a long time
I just thought..
Please GOD keep my mom alive

Mom went through two different surgeries
each lasted for 4 hours
I was in middle school at those moments
Nothing was ever spoken
Father stayed strong for both my brother and I
I would look at my fathers face
He wasn't in the moment
It was like a dream
All of this was hard to see

I kept asking my father if I could see mom at the hospital
He waited a long time to say yes
He didn't want me to feel the pain..I guess
So the day came to see my mom
She didn't really want my brother and I to come..
I can understand why now
As we stood still in the elevator
there was a silence
No eye contact
It was all fear

So finally I get to her room
I didn't really have a clue
Her face extremely pale
Then the pain hit me
Reality set in
Sadness ran through my soul
As I saw her on the bed
She smiled at me
Her smile was a tired smile
To be honest
She had a dead stare
This just wasn't fair
Doctors said she lost a lot of blood
All she wanted was a hug
Cables all over her body
Poor mommy


As we walked back to the elevator
I felt like crying
I watched my brother look down at the floor
Nothing more..
A tear ran down my cheek
My father looked at me
Then he says
"Stop crying. You don't have a reason to cry."
No reason to be sad.
Then I was scared to cry and wiped off my tears
I was angry
Father wanted me to block my true emotions
He didn't understand I was too young to be strong
I waited too long to see my mom

So days passed and mom was able to come home
Chemotherapy sessions was the only thing left
It was hard for her to keep the medicine in
I watched as my father shaved her head
She was tired of seeing her hair fall off
I knew she had enough
In the end, her hair grew little by little
Her new grown hair felt like a babies hair
She never liked short hair
But as long as she had hair, she didn't care
9 years have passed and she is healthy as can be
She believes the fruit Papaya saved her life
We had a papaya tree grow as this occurred
It was a miracle just for her

We may have arguments and we might not get along sometimes
But that is my mommy
The best mommy that she can be
So this was a little story to give people hope
Stay strong as you can be and never let go
This was just another situation that taught me to grow
I'm grateful that I have my mommy
for me to hold