MOAB

I was 28 years of age when I spoke the words to the assertive outreach team at Antenna studios that became Madonna's White House speech, performed at a woman's march.

 

I had been working as a Mentor for Bromley Mind and it was a fortnight after the Italian-Jewish girlfriend I'd had a sweet and romantic weekend with had called off the relationship, and I found myself forlorn and bedraggled, unwashed with an unkempt beard.

 

I found myself in a situation where former work colleagues instantly switched into an aggressive and antagonistic evaluation mode that was routine practice for their assessment of patients. I was asking if there was anything that could be done about the death threats personally directed at me in David Bowie's albums. They were immediately alerted and aroused.

 

In the midst of this open and hostile opposition I found myself expressing future album titles and concepts, such as, The Next Day, Blackstar, Lazarus, and the compilation album Nothing has Changed. "I could turn myself into a symbol and be seen on CD covers in every record store across the planet", I had said.

 

In 2005 I had said to a doctor, "I'm always the night before", and "the album will be called The Next Day".

 

At Antenna studios I pushed this idea as an album title with a surface screen setting of the album theme being after the recording of the album "Heroes" in Berlin. Where Are We Now was a song title taken from the title of a poem I had published in my first book, and I said Justin Case would be the name he will use in his first single from the album. I called myself the Blackstar because many people may have heard the Keep it Unreal album, but I wasn't famous, I was unseen and unknown. The song was also recorded by a black singer, which the doctor thought satisfactorily demeaned me.

 

For the online cave-wall to work, I needed Madonna to speak some words at a woman's march event. I was 40 years of age when the event commenced and the speech was spoken. I had forgotten almost entirely having uttered the words, "I have thought a lot about blowing up the White House, but I know this won't change anything" and, "I choose love, are you with me?"

 

I had paid no attention to the singer at all, she was a name I knew, an icon, someone I thought that liked to cause controversy. I was convinced controversy was the evolutionary role function of celebrities, I was aware however that they were also actors playing scapegoat roles for the press in controlled media games.

 

In 2016 I played an online YouTube stream of her album Rebel Heart and I didn't rate the album at all, I seemed to recall thinking she had a dreadful sound, her songs sounded to me as though they were sung for children, but the content wasn't at all suitable for children. I posted images of her onto my Flickr account; one was next to an ancient phallus.

 

I knew little about the singer, hadn't followed her over the years, hadn't listened to her, hadn't read any biographies, but over the last two years have come to learn a side of her that seems to me entirely reprehensible. She has modelled her Instagram and Twitter posts from my primary source stimuli posted onto social-media platforms. Standing outside of the folly and naiveté of youth, I wish I had never become involved with her.

 

When I first realised that the singer was mirroring my online posts I thought it seemed like a bit of fun that may last a week or two and even though I never drink alcohol I bought some beers and a couple of grams of marijuana and in a kind of party atmosphere I posted tweets that I knew she would be reading. Madonna only wanted one thing, a trophy for her cabinet of awards, she wanted the Oscar. This I had seen in her orange pants as she gave the speech which I watched moments before tweeting to her, but I thought if she knew me I could bring her around. Her pursuit has been criminal and unrelenting under full view and attention of the mainstream press and governments.

 

It has seemed to me she has been cruel, selfish, inhumane, she has contributed to wrecking an otherwise steady and stable marriage of eight years, she has led me into jail, has subjected me to constant threats of violence, she has driven me away from a job and a house in the US to homelessness in the UK. She poses online wearing heavy gold necklaces sporting cash in the hand. I live in poverty and in exile.

 

 

In my youth I studied art, and I tried to be an artist. I abhorred war and the military. I painted and drew, but I was never really talented enough for art school. I seemed to discover however that some of my artwork seemed to have a magical effect. The first of these that I seemed to notice was a long sleeved green T-shirt given to me by my Nan that was the same shade of green I had painted earlier in the week on a figure on my bedroom wall. I stood with green sleeve touching green design. I didn't use the word magic; I just thought it seemed interesting.

 

After the famous artists, surrealists, impressionists, futurists, Dadaists I began to become interested in ancient art, cave art and I would paint shamanic figures on my walls.

 

In April 2017 whilst living in an apartment in the United States I discovered images of Mexican cave paintings and I posted them onto my public Facebook page.

 

The US government were observing my online posts on account of Madonna snitching on me to the FBI after the controversy she had caused. The president had called the speech, "Disgusting!" and the White House interpreted the Mexican cave art and the stone cross circle on the mound as men in caves and a landing site for a bomb drop. On the night of the 12th of April I posted the triple horn of Odin symbol and the next day on the 13th of April this became the MOAB that was alleged to have been dropped on men in caves in Afghanistan as reported by the world-stage media.

 

I was devastated, totally shattered inside, for several days I believed that I was responsible for the deaths of 96 human lives in the Middle East. This wasn't what I was about. I was a pacifist.

 

The media presented Russia flexing its might with the father of all bombs which was said to be more deadly than the mother.

 

Upon further study of the MOAB articles over the week I realised that the event had been a dreadful hoax, fake news, a hoodwink for the masses and temporarily myself.