The Apple of his Eye

Peculiar place to meet, thought Sarah, as she approached the warehouse. The invitation from Jack had come as a surprise; she had only known him when she was an infant, and she had only faint memories of those days. She could conjure up hazy images; a series of still pictures, like a disjointed slideshow. And when she tried to focus on the details of her mind’s images, they would change. Were Jack’s eyes brown or blue? Were her memories truly memories, or were they simply reconstructions based on the stories her mother had told?

Mother… Why had Jack not invited her? She had been his leading lady in four of his films. He barely knew me, thought Sarah, I was just an actress’ daughter. Perhaps it was for the best. Jack had loved her mother once but she had not returned his affections. He had left the city and, until Sarah had received his cryptic letter, she had assumed he had not been back since.

As Sarah approached the door of the warehouse, she became aware of her sweaty palms. She wiped them against her jeans and took a deep breath before stepping through the entryway. The building was vast and largely empty. Littered on the floor were dozens of apples. A man"Jack"stood on a box in a crouched position, looking through a simple camcorder. Slowly he turned around until he spotted Sarah.

“You’re a carbon copy of your mother,” Jack said as he approached Sarah, shaking his head. As he neared, he picked an apple from the ground and held it out.

“Apple?” he asked.

“No… Thank you,” said Sarah. Jack shrugged and took a bite. Then he threw the apple back in the air and it landed with the others.

“You might be wondering why I invited you here,” Jack said, falling back to sit on a nearby box.

“Yes, I didn’t know you were back in town.”

“I left far too much behind in this town to leave for good. My past came calling.” He was now leaning forward, cupping his head in his right hand. He stared at Sarah with a strange look in his eyes, as if he were studying her. Blue, Sarah thought suddenly. So his eyes were blue. Bright and piercing.

“How is she?” asked Jack.

“I’m sorry?” The question had come out of the blue.

“Your mother, Meg. How is she?”

“Good. Well… She’s crazy,” laughed Sarah. “She still has big dreams of making it as an actress. But she’s doing well.”

Jack smiled and looked off in the distance. Then he hopped off of his box and clapped his hands.

“It’s about time,” said Jack. “I only need a few shots of your face, Sarah. For my next film.”

Sarah blushed and stammered, “you want me to be in your film? Are you sure?”

“Yes,” said Jack. “It has to be you. I have a vision, Sarah, laid out perfectly in my mind. When I say it has to be you, it has to be you.”

“Okay,” said Sarah. “I suppose...”

“Perfect,” shouted Jack, clapping his hands. “Stand right there.”

It only lasted a few minutes. There were no re-shoots, just one long, continuous shot of her standing quite uncomfortably, unsure of what to do. And then Sarah was sent on her way. As she left the warehouse, she felt strange, as if she were leaving a part of her past behind. She doubted she would ever see Jack again.

The next week, Sarah found a package outside of her door. A package she had not been expecting. She ripped it open and looked inside: a box. And within the box, a single CD, labelled with the single word ‘Film.’ Heart beating, Sarah raced to her DVD player and popped in the CD. Sure enough, it was Jack’s film.

It was a short, abnormal film, opening with a shot of dozens of apples falling. Scenes of nature; an orchard. And then, Jack’s face appeared, staring intently out of the television screen. His face faded to make way for Sarah’s mother’s face; a still picture from one of her old films. Finally, Sarah’s own face appeared on the screen. And then Sarah saw it. The reason Jack had invited her to meet, and the reason Jack had come back to town. She had not seen it before, but now, as she gazed into the piercing blue eyes of her own visage in the television screen, it was as clear as a camera’s lens.  

Reviews

[Shannon]

Nice, subtle twist. Well written. Enough weirdness to keep one interested but Sarah's voice rang extremely true.

Are you interested in ideas for improvement?

[JR Lord]

Thank you for the review. I'm glad you picked up on the twist; I was trying to avoid being too ham-fisted about it, but worried that it may have been too subtle.

I am always open to critiques or suggestions for improvement, so I'd appreciate any advice you have to offer!

[Shannon]

I personally don't think it's too subtle. Title helps, as well. Although it doesn't give too much away. The way you have written it, one assumes it is a reference to mother/daughter. Excellent fake out.

One thing I have learned recently that, while technically correct, many she/he saids break the flow a bit. Worth looking at. Also this sentence sticks out as awkward (because the rest is very well written) :
“I am,” said Sarah. “I didn’t know you were back in town.”
Maybe just:" yes, I didn't..."

[JR Lord]

Thanks for the suggestion! That sentence does stick out and interrupt the flow.