She Seeks the Woman

This was written exclusively for my daughter, which would be why some of the lines mean nothing except to her and me.

There once was a day

When she worshiped his laugh

She longed to be with him

Held tight in his grasp

 

He closes his eyes

And can see her before him

That four year old girl

That used to adore him

 

They played in her room

They walked hand in hand

They went to the zoo

They dug in the sand

 

Wall to wall Barbies

Room filled with balloons

Down the stairs on a blanket

Rugrats cartoons

 

He didn’t notice it happen

He doesn’t know when

That four year old girl

Became suddenly ten

 

They went on adventures

She learned to ride bikes

Rollerskates, Pokemon

Cat in the Hat hikes

 

He closes his eyes

And can see her before him

That ten year old girl

That used to live for him

 

They search for the weasel

They build Barbie’s home

Britney, the Spice Girls

A cruise ship to roam

 

What happened to all

Those years in between?

That ten year old girl

Is turning thirteen

 

She’s too old for Barbie

Her world’s now PG-13

And he misses the girl

He bounced on his knee

 

He closes his eyes

And can see her before him

The thirteen year old girl

Starting to ignore him

 

She’s seeking the woman

She’ll one day become

Why must it be now?

So soon and so young

 

He didn’t see it coming

It was never foreseen

That thirteen year old girl

Has just turned sixteen

 

He longs to be with her

But she’s left him alone

Her friends more important

Her ipod, her cell phone

 

He wishes they could talk

But he doesn’t know how

Each time that he tries

It turns ugly somehow

 

Why does he holler?

Why does he yell?

He just wants to love her

Instead he puts her though hell

 

He never means to

It’s not his intention

He’s afraid it’s too late

To give her redemption

 

The hurt that she feels

He can’t kiss and make better

Each time that he tries

Her pillow gets wetter

 

Where once was such closeness

Is now hurt and pain

If he could just take it back

And start over again.

 

He closes his eyes

And can see her before him

The sixteen year old girl

That he’s made to abhor him

 

She cries in ways

He can’t understand

He can’t know her pain

She won’t take his hand

 

He cries in ways

She’ll one day understand

She wants to grow up

But he still wants to be Dad

 

He finds himself sitting

Alone in her room

Remembering the days

That left him too soon

 

Forever and always

She was right by his side

The seat is now empty

Too often he’s cried

 

He still has his memories

Tucked away in a box

Her first fallen tooth

Her first pair of socks

 

Artwork that used to

Hang on his walls

A stitch from her chin

Her favorite dolls

 

He gently touches each one

And his heart starts to burn

Because he finally knows

His baby can never return

 

She seeks the woman

That she’ll one day become

He just wants to be Daddy

And have her stay young

 

He loves her so much

She’s his precious pearl

But she seeks the woman

And he misses the girl

 

 

 

 

I’m so sorry that I didn’t end up

being the Daddy that you always hoped for.

But you are the daughter I always hoped for.

Reviews

[lovejulez03]

Wow, this is beautifully written and so easy to relate to! You can never truly understand what it's like to be a parent until you're grown and/or a parent of your own. It made me sad to read this, but at the same time it was inspiring me and reminded me of how hard it is to grow up and what a mixture of emotions comes with having a child. I loved it!

[jkhatz]

Anything I say after reading this poem will sound contrived. How can I follow beauty, how can I critique perfection? I am stunned and at a loss. This piece conveys a parent's sorrow watching his child mature and grow distant with profound clarity. I know it must be hard for you to share this, being so close to your heart, but I am thrilled you did.

[TheFemininePad]

This is amazing Jim. You remind me of another writer on here by the name of Tate. His 'Fatherhood' poem won first place in my unique and original writings contest. Your poem reminded me of his poem. Tate wrote about his son and daughter. I really feel it intriguing the way you wrote this. The progression through time grabbed my attention. I've never experienced this in my life, but it sounds very interesting. This is a wonderful tribute to your daughter.

[littlelilypurplebride]

wish my dad knew me like this only knew him a short time cause he went through abuse so he went down hill he's a drinker i pray for him everyday you did a great job on this you sound like a amazing dad i always looked to god and my grandpa as a dad but i have a father in law thats like a dad. god bless lily

[Julie Beth]

this was really sweet i loved the flow of this poem some of the best memories i have are with my dad you did an outstanding job on this it was amazing :D

[qaralynn]

This is really beautiful!!!! absolutely love it!!

[Gemma Elizabeth]

I just got a little choked up! You've made want to phone my dad and tell him I love him. Excellent poem. It gave a very clear emotions of a dad longing for his little girl.

[Celeste21]

What an amazing piece of writing, This touched me on a different level b/c I don't have a good relationship w/ my dad and you were able to portray some of the thoughts that are going on behind a father's eyes. I truly did love this. The father daughter relationship is one that is extremely important but also intricate and fragile. Thanks for sharing your heart. I wish my Dad would open up to me... but maybe h just might not have feelings this deep.

[Rossen]

left me still, quite good Jim.

[JanieB]

This is absolutely beautiful.
You sound like such a wonderful father, and your daughter is now becoming the woman you helped her become.
Fantastic job..bravo!