Mommy

I wrote this for all the moms including mine :)

Mommy

 

You’re always the shining star,

That would reach us wherever we are.

 

You’ve always been sleepless at night,

Just to see that we’re all sleeping so tight.

 

You carried us so gentle,

And swayed us until we settle.

 

You’ve given us everything that we need,

And it was all in the purest of love indeed.

 

I prayed for you always,

To stand up and keep a straight pace.

 

We’ve gone through hard times,

But there we no serious crimes.

 

You said everything’s gonna be okay,

But saying that won’t cure me in a day.

 

Now I’m sorry for the things that I did,

And I wrote this for you to be with.

 

We love you even the worst of your imperfections,

'Cause a daughter can’t stand alone without your corrections.

Author's Note

tell me what you think.. i know there's a lot of flaws in here somewhere..

Reviews

[Rene Velez]

it's a good poem, nothing really wrong at all, just a little short, poems like this should be a bit longer because people can relate so well to a mothers love, I would have added a bit more personal experiences to draw people in, experiences you alone had with your mom, the warmth of her skin, the beating of heart sleeping on her lap with your head on her chest, stuff like that...small pictures

[Audrey Howitt]

I liked it--a wonderful tribute to the love you hold for your mom

[Coyote Poetry]

The poem is beautiful and wise. We need our parent for love and guidance. I was lucky and had a good hearten Grandparent. Always a kind word and a place to rest. I do the same for my children now. I like the ending to the amazing poem of love and thankfulness.
Coyote

[realmwriter]

I think it needs some revision, But over all this is a wonderfull piece of writing from a Daughter to a Mother and I am sure that when the Mother read the words of the Daughter she cried. She knows the love the Daughter has for her and she knows. She just knows...I love it.

[HorrorMaster]

pretty good

[Richard Williams]

A fine and heartfelt poem tribute to Mother. The next to last line could use a tweak though. Otherwise, good work, conveying emotion.

[Kathryn]

Nothing wrong at all. Lovely work, I really enjoyed reading this :)

I loved this, it made me smile. Mother's are such loving and graceful things, well most of them are. I think you captured them perfectly.

[Sukriti Suki]

A very nice tribute...Mother is the closest glimpse of heaven on earth.

[Dream Weaver]

A heartrending ode to mothers everywhere.
Well done.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

Balanced and fair, well done