You Are Normal

Shortest story I've ever written.

The narrator has a disability called strabismus, it causes an uneven alignment in the eyes.

 

 

I looked at my daughter, Elodie, with my right eye, my left eye off to the side, "I'm so glad you turned out normal." I said, lovingly.

Elodie gave me a hard look and yelled "NO!" making my eyes water a little, but I held them back. "YOU ARE NORMAL TOO!" she exclaimed. Making my tears flow freely, trying in vain to hide it. I gave a gentle embrace, and wiped the tears from my eyes.

"Honey." was all I said, and my eyes suddenly aligned.

Author's Note

The picture I used is absolutely ADORABLE!

Reviews

[dw817]

Reminds me a little of the turkey Jennie from, "Free Birds." Her left eye rolls around until she holds her breath and pops it back into place. She said it only happened when she was nervous so when it occurred, you knew right away she was upset about something.

http://bit.ly/1iHq7kL

[L.L. Lily]

Simple but really heartwarming/touching. I just have a question. Do you know someone who has strabismus personally or do you perhaps know the difference between strabismus, lazy eye, and amblyopia?

I ask because I’m genuinely curious for the answer to that and as a writer we have to always make sure what we write is based on something we experienced, is something thoroughly researched, and factual.

I myself have what most people will call crossed eyes/lazy eyes or strabismus (though I have yet to know the difference between them). To my knowledge a person with a "misalignment" in their eyes is not aware of their eyes turning left/right or aligning because the “wandering eye” is “turned off” so that the brain isn’t confused by two images/visions. Unless of course they are doing it on purpose (please correct me if I’m wrong). Or well I can't say that is the same for everyone.

I personally have the condition (not sure if strabismus really was the same word my doctors used) where one of my eyes turn in. I know that when the eyes wander from the opposite/outer side, the form of strabismus is called exotropia – which I don’t have, but appears to be what your character seems to have.

Mine is where my non-dominant eye turns inside (towards my nose). It’s normally an unconscious act, I wouldn’t notice my eyes turning inwards unless I’m looking forward at a distance or focusing at a distance. I know this based on observations and as some people point out. Same goes when I'm tired.


Because both of my eyes have different vision levels my dominant eye (left) is clearer than my right eye (blurred), but I mostly use my left eye to view everything. My right eye is essentially turned off to prevent me from seeing two images (not literally turned off but my brain turns it off) and thus that is how you get one eye turning inwards (crossed). It is also insulting when people mock or try to copy a person with crossed eyes by forcing their eyes to cross when really it’s beyond the person’s control and people who do have these conditions aren’t even aware of their eyes moving in the first place, because again (though it might not be the same for everyone), generally, the eye that wanders or misaligned, is usually subconsciously turned off for the person to adapt their eye sight.
All in all, unless you are experiencing the condition personally, someone told you that’s how they actually feel living with strabismus, just know that the person shouldn't be aware of their eyes moving unless they are purposefully/CONSCIOUSLY doing it.

Now with all of that being said, if you did based this on a personal experience (being that you do have the condition) or have a family member who has the condition and told you how it feels like or how it works, then fine, it’s safe to keep it without risking offending anybody or being called out for whether you are explaining the condition (especially since you defined the condition in the beginning) correctly.

IF this is just based on a work of fiction and your intention was meant to narrate the story, to make it sound more accurate, rather than having the character narrate or say that her other eye turned outwards, narrate it using a narrator point of view (being consistent and factual). It would make more sense with the narrator saying one of her turned outwards because it is showing us an image as if we are watching it unfold rather than in the perspective of the character. It would also make it incorrect that she knew her eyes would magically align because again someone with the condition is unaware or it is out of their control. If they can force their eyes to straighten themselves why have the condition in the first place, hence, it would make more sense writing it in the perspective of a narrator (3rd person) rather than the character narrating it.

Hope you don’t take any offenses from my constructive response. As a writer, even if we are writing a work of fiction we still have to be grammatically correct and factual especially if you are going to use terms (and medical terms). Even the smallest detail can create a misconception (even if it already is misconceived).

P.S. I also in a way emphatize with her because even I fear and would have a broken heart if my child had to go through what I am going thru (being bullied or judged from looking different. It breaks my heart that people like us or her would feel that way, and it also made me fall in love with her daughter for not being ashamed of her mother and loving her. Some kids tend to be embarrassed with their parents and parents with such conditions are hit more hard because of it. Thanks for sharing your work.

[JazmanianDevil]

this was cute and simple. It's amazing how fast i was able to establish a connection with characters i will only know for the span of a few seconds. Well done.

[Lily]

I do my best, and it's good to know that what I was trying to do worked (Ie; establising a connection with the characters.) I think the disability really helped that.

[Woody]

short but full of meaning. each reader can expand on that but you certainly said it all in a few words.
sweet little story. "the power of love" could be another title ?

[Konigin]

I like this. A lot. Well done! :)

[SpeedyHobbit Armstrong]

I think I know someone with eyes like that, I remember noticing but not wanting to ask for fear of sounding awkward or rude. Besides, she's a sweet person

[Lily]

Yes, most of them seem to be, I think it is because they are ridiculed a lot, so they know how to make someone feel good.

[Lily]

Or they could have a lazy eye, but strabismus can't be helped by glasses or contacts, I learned how to make my eyes do that, and I must say, it is the most confusing, kind of cool, and disorienting thing ever.

[lissalovesyou]

Beautiful. The picture you used is so sweet:)
And the last sentence. Aww... Added to favs.
lissalovesyou:)

[Emily]

Love this story! Good job Jewel!

[Lily]

I killed my friend at school with this, just showed her it. She said, and I quote "I'm done with you. Just done."