Exorcism

They finally broke me.

Not 'cause he broke my heart

I'm not sure I even liked him

They broke me by reminding me that I'm not good enough.

They soiled my sheets.

I've never felt so violated and raw

I'm not even sure if I can blame anyone but myself

I was weak, and I still am.

At this point, I'm dying for a drink,

Or a party,

Or anything that doesn't require me to be good enough.

I'm not sure I would even make it that far

I'll never be good enough for anyone

But I'm so tired of being sad,

I'm tired of trying to be different

I'm tired of constantly being rejected,

I'm tired of this passive-aggressive war with my family

I'm tired of getting my hopes up

I'm tired of trying

I might just drink my problems away.

Going to drown them out with sweet bitterness

I may even smoke them out.

Anything to exorcise these demons