My only dream as everyone else of average ..

I am a girl being a girl i love to be a complete woman. So my dream to become wife mother daughterinlaw are very rare to normal woman.

I served my parents took and finished responsibility helping siblings and parents in their troubles.

To average status of my family i raised them up to higher middle class with trip to America.

I just wished i could get married for my parents as i was already 29 yrs when i was ready to get married. I didnt wish my husband even to be a nice person even without a job too thinking i would help financially my family of husband. Very far from how he should look like. It was difficult to get good alliance, i was not involved with any love affair with a failure of love at my college time. People used to like me but no one dared to propose and i didnt pay attention thought i would get arranged marriage. Very lately i got wedded to my x husband which was arranged, he was average but responsible when it comes to family responsibility and finamces. I was not so pretty to him in his needs. So it was difficult to nurture love between us.

Anyways, that wedding nroke...
I still feel incomplete without a complete married life. Lost raising my son. It is difficult for me for my rest of life to live with myself.

I loved him and i just only wish to be your wife. I dont need jewelry, money not even trips to places. I love to take cae of you mom and our kids. I was a silent person, like to cook, pray, visit places, and love to spend time with him. I dont hav that much desire in career and it is secomd to family. I enjoy doing things for him, washing his clothes, cooking for him, ironing his clothes, helping him in any way. Anyway woman loves to spend with her man personally amd romamtically, i domt want to write too much about it and it does mean i am not that much interested in romance. I love to be loved my him. Only people like me doesnt expose too much which is not needed when it comes to man who wants their lafy to be homely.
I am a mediocre woman with little fantasies, hardworking, if it comes to anything i dont hesitate to do amything for him, this is my love for him. And he also doesmt hesitate to do anything for me. Who doesnt like adventures to roller coaster or any exciting things. I love to go over long drives road trips travsl in flight sitting beside him.

But time has tested me more than my patience because of people, and its not God' s fault. People played a nuisance s**t on us for their benefits. I lost all my youth of 20 yrs in doing for others. Still yet i didnt get a chance to hug him, spend with him. Still people haunting us exploiting us. What if its not our mistake cant i give rise to our family at this juncture. My life time extends with death survivals. Chinese marry in 40s give birth to kids , am i that old that people are saying do need wedding, we do weding to God everyday, how old is he now, millions of ages, why people embarrass and hurt me even to welcome their family, do i need to see your face now. Whats the mistake i did, i did so much love to every member of family, intentionally i didnt hurt anyone unless it was mistake from them.
I love you jacob, i embraced ypur family, religion, cant you take care of me for my rest pf family, i came for you leabing my family, waiting fot since so many years, you dont even come and meet me, i dont know why you are doing these wrong steps, its nothing wrong to care for others but it doesnt mean you make me suffer, for so long time that people are saying are ypu able yo f** you on bed, laughing at me to giv birth to kid, i just listened to you through oit these days, you made me to wait come for you and now why you are not coming to me, it was then i got scared of your family tjinking i may fit to, but its now they are thinking do we need her,
But i never ignored nor disrespected your family, i just wanted to be your wife. For a person like me nothing interests neither money luxurious things more than a family husbamd and kids.

People threw me out of your home town i was just waiting for you with my home thinking you will come for me today tomorrow ..

Its really hurting even to see people around who are exploiting our life. I just feel like why i am around them why i M suffering because of them though i cared good for them.

You being so modest and caring for others you are ignoring my pain and struggle how much i will bear. Dont you think you want to be spending with me. How much you will do for others losing your own life.

There shpuld be a limit if it contimues this it will make your life struggle. I think its enough of caring for others.

So please with how much responsibility and care you did love to me you need to make me ne with you to hav our own family.

Nothing i want just be your wife and take care of my family.

I lost my parents love too, they just need me to serve them and need my money. What do you think i dont want to hav my own only life with you. How much i should serve everyone, i only hav you who make me a complete with our family.

Its not that i am escapimg from my responsibilty to others even God doesnt want us to struggle, everyone wants lead a better life of what they love and need. Why to struggle with pain losing our intent of leading life.


Hope you understand me
Jessy Jacob
You gav ypur family name and struggle to serve but till now i havent been with you completely.
I thought i would see you in dad's funeral but didnt you didnt show up i dont know why
Its been a decade i saw you.
Only you know what it meams to see you by me.
You know how much i missed you did whayever i can just to talk to you while leaving houston. But you are very generously giving your time to many without thinking how much pain you are going through with hour body and health.

Remember people use when you something when you dont hav anything noone lpoks at you, i just loved you gave my everything to you didnt expect anything but you gave your love to me.

I love you so much
I dont think anyone can understamd me and my love to you only you can feel what you mean to me, dont think i am ill, with this heart and body i did so much to my family and my son. Kindly do meet me amd take me with you, think that this is my last stage of life where i can spend my best part of life, if you cross this time i will be no more alive.


Love you so much waiting for you.
Jessy Jacob.
I did whayever so far only for you even the reason for my birth too.