I miss him a lot………..

 

I don’t know how much I miss him, just want to stay beside him holding hands, smelling his body scent, watch him whatever he is doing, making things for him, making him to feel me, reduce his tension, hold his feet if it is painful, a mild massage to his back and legs, a constant stare at him,  I don’t think I can stay away from him, anymore it has been a deep feeling since when he met me, patha nahi, heart just goes on to him to have askew, and see what he is doing when I come out of my cubicle as he used to sit just beside me, and when he moved to another floor, how many times I created a reason to go to that floor, sometimes to get the print out and give a look at his cubicle, and go and meet my other colleagues who sits in the same floor of him, and may be a lead to question something, always I tried to find a reason to see him. Sometimes I felt so glad to him pass by aisle walkway when I was passing through, seeing his bubblegum mouth blowout, or when he just arrives to office.

 

When we sit in the same floor, hardly I can hear his heartbeat, but I could hear his voice, sneeze in that chilly winter of Nov & Dec. In that meetings sitting beside was a chance or a direct opposite spot was something great to have that every week, and his surprise look when I hurt him with my pen on my own finger just to see how he reacts, is there any pain in his fingers, and sudden applause or shock to see me speaking in meeting and giving presentation, always he used to feel awful why I don’t speak in meetings, and in that early breakfasts which he arranged one of it, gives me a look and then drifts his amazing stare to other as if he is not watching me, really miss to see him, it has been yrs, and yrs almost 11 yrs I met him and the last see of him was 7 yrs back, waiting to see him again directly  not just in snaps ,which I felt like its been a decade body changes face changes and want to see how he is talking still the same boyish style of kidding or a matured man look with formal voice to ladies and gentlemen or still playing the same jokes of “Another day in paradise”, O my man I miss you a lot, missing to see you soon, let me allow to see and feel your chin on chin of me, hand in hand, body to body touch, when it is gonna happen O God and my dear mother I ask you both …..