Suicidal

I was having a really tough semester, and Geology was seriously kicking my emotional butt. So I punched this out really quick as a cathartic exercise. Please, don't take it seriously at all. LOL

It was a Wednesday when she decided to kill herself. Walking to College Creek Market at Humboldt State University. It started to rain. Not heavily, but enough to kill her expectations of a nice day tomorrow. She went in search of a salad. It was only 7pm. The market was open until midnight and she had gotten a salad later than seven. When she arrived the shop girl told her that the salad bar was closed. There was no saran wrap over the lettuce and other ingrediants, and she even said “Are you sure? Not just for one more little one?” but the girl was adamant and she told her that the time they closed it was up to the people who worked there and their discretion.

She walked to the ice cream section and felt her heart plummet as she searched for her favorite flavor. Nothing else would do at that point. She wondered how long her roommate’s belts were in accordance to how high her bunk bed was back at the dorms. She found a secondary best flavor and paid. Smiling at the girl who refused her a salad with a falsity that no one could detect. She walked back. She stopped at the smoking gazebo and lit a cigarette. It was bland and tasteless Her mouth had been burnt earlier by a mocha with caramel earlier that afternoon, an attempt to fight off the alcohol she had been drinking that day. Noone was around and she felt lost and defeated. Nothing to distract her from the imminent failure of Geomorphology exams. Failures that would ultimately destroy her future. It began to rain harder and she wondered just how long it would take to die from lithium overdose, and especially how painful it might be. Could it be more painful than what she was going through now? She had no idea.

She decided to take a hike with some stoners into the redwoods for a smoke out session. The rain came down heavily, but no one seemed to care. After smoking several hits she began to feel the depression set in and the antisocial and misanthropic feelings come out. She told everyone good bye and took off into the darkness surrounded by trees the size of elephants or higher. She cut across a stream and looked for the best was to descend back to campus. She hopped across two rocks thinking of how their angularity had been smoothed by the rates of velocity in the graded stream system. She cursed her thought pattern enough to not notice a protrusion in the ground that caught her foot by surprise. Caught into the stream she tumbled down in a state of numbed confusion. Her head struck another large rock and she faded into blackness for a moment. She lay there in the trickling water wondering if anyone would find her. Wondering if she cared. The depth and the width times the velocity, she thought to herself. That’s how you measure…something. Before she knew what was happening her body rolled over and she began to tumble further. A steep hill lay beneath her, but she didn’t realize it until she was at the river’s end and she was instantly killed by the snapping of her neck.

As she rose from her lifeless body she wondered one thing: was it all worth it? Who would tell the story of a girl baned by geomorphology and killed by it as well. A white light (those that everyone seems to see) met her at the end of her thought and she was instantly relieved of any pain. Comforted by the mystical beyond, thoughts of school were gone and she was lifted away from all her worries. Exams were not important where she was now. But a certain feeling of incompletion haunted her in the great everafter. Geomorphology was a force not to be reckoned with.