[untitled]

Love. How it contorts the mind, heart and soul...

How is it

that I can feel so ready

And yet

nothing changes

 

I want so badly for somebody

Anybody

to come along

 

And

No

One

Comes

 

Which makes me start to think that

maybe

it’s because it’s me

 

Maybe there will

Never

Be anyone

For me

 

And unless you have ever felt like that

you can never no what it feels like

 

to feel

unlovable

 

 

 

What hurts even more

is that I thought there was someone.

 

You weren’t really a great match

and it probably wouldn’t have worked

and there is a good possibility that it would’ve ended badly

but at least something would’ve happened

 

Something that would’ve told me

that there is someone

who looks at me

and doesn't see

unlovable

but instead sees

Wow

 

Or something along that line.

 

 

Actually, come to think of it

it would’ve been great if there was anyone who actually

Saw me

 

and maybe even took a second glance

and maybe even thought

any thought

about me

 

how great it would be if it were you

because you seem like a pretty decent guy

and you are pretty cute

and you’re pretty tall

and you’re very sweet

and seem kind of shy

and you have that great

boy smell

 

But you don’t know

That I know that.

 

And I can’t tell you either

because that small shred of

Almost Friendship

that hangs in the balance between us

would

Disintegrate

if you knew

 

I think.

 

it just seems

so unimaginably unfair

that I didn’t even notice those things about you

until

that one day

where you said that thing

and you did that other thing

 

So

now I don’t know what to do

or think

or say

 

And it’s

Infinitely depressing

that you don’t act on it

 

Were you kidding?

Was it a joke?

Did you get caught up in the moment

and it seemed like the right thing to say?

 

Why would you do that to me?

 

Well,

in all honesty

it's because you don’t know you’re doing it.

 

You don’t know that you are kneeling

On my heart

That you are squishing it

 

Sometimes you don’t even notice I’m there

 

 

Sometimes I think I must have imagined it.

That in a fit of wonder lust,

I dreamed that whole conversation up.

 

That would make sense.

But it wouldn’t make me feel

Any better.

 

But

 

I guess,

In the end,

It’s not your fault.

 

I guess

In the end

It’s not really anyone’s fault

Other than mine

 

Because I’m the one

Who thought

Your

Attention

Would ever

Fall on me

 

What a dreamer I am.

Reviews

[Rhonda]

is this a true poem? i've felt that way before, but now i don't.