Rainbow Jane

Rainbow Jane

A Poem by jesserose99
"

listening to the voices

"

Rainbow Jane

sitting in her window pane

counting the shadows

dancing in her brain

waiting for them to say

walk-about the lane


The voices they tell her

where she ought to go

where she goes who knows

but the dancing shadows

and her bare feet with painted toes


See Jane swims the moat

when there never was a castle

she walks in the snow

while she waits in the water

no one comes to tell her

the shadows don't know

so on a walk-about she does go


the voices they chatter

to Jane it won't matter

she'll listen to what they say

Rainbow Jane

in her window pain

© 2015 jesserose99


Author's Note

jesserose99
.

My Review

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Featured Review

Wow. I began reading this and thought of Jane, the free spirit, following her heart. Then I got blammed with the last line and thought, whaaat? Poor dead Jane. Maybe freedom has its price. And maybe thats the moral of this tale, if you are gonna walk free, remember to look where you are going.
Captivating write. Superb.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

jesserose99

9 Years Ago

Thank you for your kind review...and I don't know about that last line being confusing because she i.. read more
alifeacoustic

9 Years Ago

Ah, I see that now, reading it again.



Reviews

Jane is sitting in a place I have been before. I had no voices but I know shadows... I love this

Posted 9 Years Ago


I love the message here, delivered delightfully with a thoughtful rhythm. Well done!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

jesserose99

9 Years Ago

Thank you for reading Skylah!
Very good poem. I found it to be very catchy from line to line and can almost see it being one of those oddly disturbing little poems children sometime use. It was very enjoyable to picture this all in my head, if a little dark.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

jesserose99

9 Years Ago

Thank you for stopping by and the kind review!
Really enjoyed everything about this. I tend to like poems that rhyme well, like most people, and this did not disappoint. I also like that the ending is open to lots of different interpretation. In the end I am left most fascinated about the voices and shadows.

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

jesserose99

9 Years Ago

Thank you Owen, I am glad you enjoyed it!
I really liked this . Jane living in her own world through a window ... down deep in the rabbit hole... what a great image your words project a chapter in never never land... or could easily be an unheard verse of "Sweet Jane"...
when you write something that excites the readers imagination you know you've done something extraordinary
bill

Posted 9 Years Ago


jesserose99

9 Years Ago

Thank you Bill, you absolutely flatter me. :)
Fingertips walk so many keytops as we look through the windows sharing our and others' pain... ever notice how you CAN see tomorrow quite for real - in other places and still have to guess how your todays may be?

Posted 9 Years Ago


very rhythmic! now the last line says "window pain" is that on purpose? if it is then I think it is very fitting and if it isnt then I would like to say that you should leave it there.. lol just my opinion!

Posted 9 Years Ago


jesserose99

9 Years Ago

Thank you for your review..and yes, it was meant to be pain..good catch!
This poem is so enchanting. It feels like I am reading a children's poem and I can see in my mind's eye everything that Rainbow Jane is doing. Also, "Rainbow Jane sitting in her window pane" is very catchy and sets the tone for the rest of the poem. This poem reminds me of surrealism art and I really did enjoy it!

In the 2nd line of the third verse, is the word supposed to be 'there' or "their?"

Posted 9 Years Ago


jesserose99

9 Years Ago

Thanks Annie!
a free spirited woman,barefoot jane ,i can see her in my mind.

Posted 9 Years Ago


jesserose99

9 Years Ago

Thanks wordman!
 wordman

9 Years Ago

my pleasure
a couple edits needed but wow...i like the point of view...limited omniscient into the head of one who does hear those voices and lives in a world just next door to ours...

thoughtful write, jesserose.

j.

Posted 9 Years Ago


jesserose99

9 Years Ago

thank you Jacob!

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14 Reviews
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Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on December 5, 2015
Last Updated on December 5, 2015

Author

jesserose99
jesserose99

lakewood, CO



About
I am a tarot reader and numerologist, who loves to write poetry. I also write songs and love to sing and play guitar. I love art too, so clearly I just have a passion for creativity. Also love my dog.. more..

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