Demons take over

just a poem i created a second version of this poem let me know if you like the first version or second better

   first version 

              The Demons take over your mind, 

              Your soul, 

              They drag you down, 

              Tell you that your worthless, 

              That your nobody, 

              They ruin your life, 

               Destroy your mind, 

                Their here to steal , 

                Kill, 

                  Destroy, 

                "But" with God by your side he can change everything

 second version 

      Demons take over, 

    Demons, 

Demons everywhere, 

their taking over your mind, 

your soul is lost, 

they began to drag you down, 

tell you that you aint nothing, 

that your worthless, 

that your nobody, 

they begin to ruin your life, 

destroying your mind, 

their here to steal, 

kill, 

destroy, 

but with God by your side he can change everything

Author's Note

let me know what you think
ive been struggling writeing due to my past 7 years of stuggle and these past two years its just been here and there to be able to write im hopeing i can get my inspiration back to where i once was .

Reviews

[MadScientist]

I think with a bit of practice I’m sure you’ll develop into a really good author. You have talent it just needs polishing.
I get that sentiment, I write to express myself and I mainly write poetry

[DeAn]

very true. short and sweet, but powerful. great job!