collaborative beginnings to a poem that found an end.

a collaboration with my very good, very talented friend Leigh. his stuff is here: http://leightuplin.blogspot.com/

what next
from the height of any language
from the light of a loose thread
entwining behind my eyes
our colour and circles
and written sounds waiting...
snaking thoughts coil
through the wrinkles in my brain...
I tap my pencil
rhythmically onto paper
hoping the slight graphite-etched sound
will solidify my gel-like thoughts

Reviews

[Crowley]

Not sure I should review this after you told me to suck it. but here it goes anyway....sounds like the most round about look at writers block ever written. It might not be about that, but thats what I got out of it. Superbly crafted, relaxing and almost soothing pace and rhythym (picturing the poem being layed down in coils like the thoughts). Last lines are genius. Nice work people, now can we get some lunch.

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

stunning and crisp descriptive poetic view from the inside out ~pulling verbal threads and reweaving a classic view ow the creative word~

[Sweet_pale_cacophony]

I love how this is so very compact..you know,not wasting a single word,just with the words that were needed here.So very neat,succinct..
I like how it began with what next from the height of any language..and also i like the line through the wrinkles in my brain,using wrinkles with brain is a phrase which is so original..
hoping the slight graphite-etched sound
will solidify my gel-like thoughts..hmmm..don't we all hope so,solidifying the gel like thoughts as we are expressing them..

[.]

"snaking thoughts coil
through the wrinkles in my brain..."
...what a beautiful write..
...a great piece of poetry...
love that last line--love it

J:)

[An owl on the moon]

There is such a brilliant vision and feel of the writing process that takes place in our minds... flowing out through our fingers... I love the dance of thoughts and colors here!