Into the Fire

Thoughts flow like flies hissing while they circle,
Into my ear and out my heart.
Everything changes just give it some time.
I wish it was all one life but its not.
That straight line walk to the top isn't possible anymore.
there's some trips and some falls
and the soil is used to the weight that we carry.
If we hold each other we can balance.
If we gain balance we can become healthy souls.
With health the mirror will look prettier.
And our sight will welcome in more colors.
The look of an eye is full of all the visions it has seen
They melt together into a foggy swarm,
glistening in a softly white glow.
The air takes on so many swirls it seems to carry all complexion.
Somewhere deep in your mind there is another world
One that can take over this one and make it into a paradise.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

I like the honest tone to the poetry.
"If we gain balance we can become healthy souls.
With health the mirror will look prettier.
And our sight will welcome in more colors."
I agree. Balance is key for us to know peace and calm in our life. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Nyu]

Thank you so much for reading and understanding it :D

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[little thoughts]

yeah true and beautiful !

[Nyu]

Thanks I am glad you agree :)

[V. P. Trujillo]

You know the reality around you, within you. this leaks through in your poetry, Jackie.

You should feel very happy, you could be lost in an empty dug out hole, rather than a swirling whirlpool.

[Nyu]

yeah that's right n_n !!!

[Wolfwind]

I really like the flow of imagery and motion of thought in this piece. It takes us on a journey and chain of ideas that when followed, can present us with the light to overcome the obsticles that we face in day to day existence.
The only line that I have an issue with is "glistening in a softy? white glow" SOFTY doesn't quite sound right, perhaps just SOFT?
Overall I really liked the message and form and flow your piece took. The image used, as well as the red color of the ink helped the piece be absorbed in a deeper way than I think just black in and no image may have.

Great Ink! Thanks for sharing!
Wolfwind

[Nyu]

yeah thank you so much and yeah >.< again thanks i meant softly white. i corrected it thanks i dont want to send the wrong message across.

[Michael G. Smith]

Very inspiring and thought provoking piece.

[Nyu]

aw thank you :)