Salsa

learning to dance - difficult, but worth it

Latin fever burns the soles of my shoes

struggling to keep the frantic tempo.

Salsa beat drums into my bones.

 

Left foot forward, right foot back,

unbutton my collar to let the sweat boil away.

Salsa beat fans the flames of my soul.

 

Lost in the music, master the mambo,

throw in a cha-cha for flair, spin the girl.

Salsa beat starts my pulse racing.

 

Cuban heat crackles on the crowded dance floor,

hold her close, eyes locked, song crescendoes, one last dip.

Salsa beat is the spice of life.

 

Author's Note

Okay, I've revised the entire last stanza, but I still really don't like the last line. I just kind of wrote as a spur-of-the-moment thing, so it still needs work. Please give me honest criticism. If it's all crap, let me know.

Reviews

[Fran Marie]

Left foot forward, right foot back,

unbutton my collar to let the sweat boil away.

Salsa beat fans the flames of my soul.

I can feel the passion of the Salsa dance~ a real feel good write~ upbeat and enjoyable to read~

THanks for submitting your lovely verse to the Love Shack contest~Fran Marie

[Sianna Reader]

This poem just made me feel like I was dancing, the way you brought about the words made the entire poem seem alive with the beat of the Music you portrayed. I really enjoyed this piece, it was interesting and unique.

Sianna xxx

[Kaye]

I loved how you used the "Salsa beat" lines at the end of each of the first three stanzas. It kept a very salsa rhythm. I definitly feel like dancing now.
I love the color's that come out from this poem. All the reds of the burning and boiling makes it seem very latino in my mind.
I did think if you're going to change anything, change the last stanza. There was so much energy and life in the first three stanzas, and then in the last it's like the dance is just gone without ever ending. I think it's because of the structure as much as the fact that you switch over to moonlight, which is much cooler.
I love the idea of the dance ending in the last stanza, but because of the strength of the previous ones it might help to either give it a sharp final downbeat or a final spin into a breath at the end.

I swear when I first clicked on the title I was thinking of the dip, not the dance. ^^;