The Result Of True Love

With every glance down
I know I'm making a mistake
But I can't stop myself
I can hardly believe it's really me

          "I'm urging you not to judge me, don't look at me disapprovingly. Don't shake your head with disgrace. You left me with no other choice."

The face in the mirror looks back smiling
It's as if she's realized that finally the pain will stop
This is the only way that the anger will go away
The only way that I will be free

"You beg me to stop, to think before I act. Pleading with me that you care, that you love me uncontrollably."

But those lines have no effect on me anymore. Whatever you say now will surely be a lie by sunrise tomorrow.

The metal slices my skin
The blood almost seems unreal
Shining and glowing it leaves my veins
Reaching, exploring, releasing me
As everything goes black your face is the last I see

Softly my heart whispers, "Be strong the fight doesn't have to end now."

Scars mark my body
Bruises ease my sorrows
But neither of these matter to me as much as you
If only you knew how much more your lies hurt
Behind each lies a a memory of your deceit

Your lies cut deeper than any knife ever could

This latest one is due to your sudden disappearance
A night after beautiful love making
You suddenly vanish for three days straight
The excuse you offer now is that suddenly you had
Some housework to do, "errands" you call them
I point out the scratches and marks on your back
Your response, a hard days work at the gym

"I try my best to trust you unconditionally but still anxiety lingers"

I want this all to stop, to end
I don't wanna hurt anymore
Can you take away my pain?
Help me end these suicidal thoughts within me

I'm drowning in all your lies
Save me from my addiction of you

I scream out into the night
For assistance, for assurance
I just need to know you'll be there at the end of the tunnel

It's getting hard to breathe
It feels as if the walls are closing in on me
I can feel the darkness seeping through my veins
It's heading straight to my heart
I need you to breathe for me
Help me inhale the good and exhale the bad
Give me your heart and take away this blade

But unfortunately that look in your eyes
Tells me that this is something you can't comprehend

So the cuts continue into the night
Followed by tears and less hope
Your dirty deeds slowly seep through my soul
While your name forever scars my body
Sadly I'm not strong enough to resist
I'm tired of fighting

As the razor enters my wrist for the last time
All I feel is guilt and shame
I don't understand why I didn't fight harder
Why couldn't I just leave you?
Why did you have such power over me?

I remembered when I loved you and you loved me
We were inseparable once upon a time

But now here I am lying on the floor unconscious
And your on the phone insisting on urgency
When did we get here?
How did we get here?
And why weren't we strong enough to walk away?

Maybe fairy-tales had it wrong all along
Maybe this is the result of true love

As I take my last breath all I see is your face
My trembling lips exclaim,
                                   " Why couldn't you just save me?"

Reviews

[Mia]

Powerful, poignant write!

[Namuh Niffa]

great. I seen it all. great image work. from beginnin to end it had me goin.