In Love With A Bar Girl

i'm sitting on the balcony

outside my hotel room in Phuket

listening to the rain fall heavy

 

the incessant bump bump bump

of techno music

somewhere in the night

where bar girls drink tequila

and men are lecherously trying

to sate all their pent up desires....

 

Maeo sleeps soundly

in our big

soft

temporary bed,

her dark satin hair

splayed across the pillow,

her full lips serenely whisper breath,

her eyes at rest behind heavy lids...

 

so different from the

shared madness only months before...

 

everyone thinks i am crazy,

being taken for a ride...

 

if they could only let themselves

crumble in vulnerability for a moment

they would know my joy...

Reviews

[Devons]

A very real, softly-spoken moment captured here which echoes an advent that has a resonance with much of modern life and worldly romance. The Thai bride concept has become more and more prevalent in western society amongst many men that are truly disillusioned with western women. This poem shows a significant sympathy for both sides, and compares the decadence of night life which the girls so often represent and the devoted loveliness of their desire to be freed from the life they've perhaps been forced to live, and finding a man who will save them from it. This comparison is a winning one and contrasts poignantly with the stereotypical view that many on this side of the world cynically take. The Thai girl's culture is significantly different to ours and their attitude towards marriage and love is far more traditional than people and the media allow it to seem, even if it does have the appearance of prostitution - and that's another whole can of worms which one could debate in terms of moral justification...
This is the first piece of writing I have seen on this subject, and so it is refreshing to me. It deals with a very grey moral ground in a very understanding and reasonable fashion, painting a modern romance very subtly and clearly, and with intelligent humanity.

[Claws Of Fury]

I love this! So good. I thought I was the only one who fell in love with people (well, everyone) at the wrong place.

Yes to this. I dig.

[Johnny A. Rojas]

Is as if i have been there as well...knowing that people think is crazy but feeling so right at the moment only two people are alive one sleeps and the other carefully falling in love

[Gheeneil]

Giving in to love is welcoming a loved one with an open heart, which I say, is rare amongst men. Vulnerability is entirely different from being weak. Such is a courageous act, I believe.

[FlawedByDesign]

This is truly a beautifully written story. The poem starts off with a lot of low key, almost downer, feelings which showcases vulnerability, but it ultimately ends up being a wonderful portrayal of joy; the thing that makes this man happy regardless of the "others".

Nicely done.

[Coyote Poetry]

Sometime we can find peace in the heat of a tropic and special people. I was 15 years in the Army. I found peace in many dark corners with erotic and dark beauties who still haunt my mind. A beautiful poem. I like the feel of these words. A outstanding poem.
Coyote

[Ladysue]

those last three lines say it all. This was soft, tender and written so beautifully....

[Emily B]

temporary joy is still wonderful

I like the tone, I like the details . . . I like the moment of vulnerability

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

a lovey~tender warmth permeates the plush mood of the poem~the words composed in lyrical suppleness~ the poem itself is like the serenity of the body at complete rest~ beautiful~

[Sweet_pale_cacophony]

I absolutely adore this writing.It is beautiful cause it has a lovely,vulnerable essence to it.It is beautiful in a very fragile way..it melts in my mind....i hope you are getting what i am trying to say here.
In the second stanza there are these lines which i specifically liked a lot..


the incessant bump bump bump

of techno music..i like how you said incessant bump bump of techno music.
Also the line,and men are lecherously trying
to sate all their pent up desires....
This stanza sets up a contradictory mood for what is to come..
The entire description of Maeo is so poignant,so very dream like.The phrases 'her eyes at rest behind heavy lids','her dark satin hair splayed across the pillow','serenly whisper breath'..these are breathtaking phrases.
And oh!!! those last few lines..

if they could only let themselves

crumble in vulnerability for a moment

they would know my joy...i was so so much blown by those lines.When we are safely ensconced in love,and we are repeatedly coerced by people around us to think otherwise all we want is to almost beg them to understand us..which would not be possible unless 'they crumbled in vulnerability'..I must say i am in love with the phrase 'crumble in vulnerability'.The moment that phrase caught my attention,i was excited...and i think its showing....
Well written.