The Sweet And Sour Lie

I can hear the sky-train whir along the track

Through the bluster of wind

The rain smacking against the windowpane…

A collage of lonely sounds

In the otherwise quiet night…

 

The yellow Christmas lights shine in the

Room like a dull sepia dream of my

Melancholia…

I feel like a faded photograph

Collecting dust and cracking with age

In the mothball odor of stale attic walls.

 

Our love has become as moldy as the

Carpet of an east Vancouver basement apartment.

We sleep in different rooms

Annoyed with each others company

But afraid to face the reality;

That we are scared to start over

Afraid of leaving this nest of routine and comfort.

 

We tell ourselves that things will change,

Things will get better…

For six years we’ve battled each other and the world

Hoping for a victory

But always ending up having to dig deeper into

The trenches…

 

Any day now the walls will cave in

And we’ll have no choice but to

Dig our way out…

Back into life.

 

Reviews

[Sweet_pale_cacophony]

Do you know how very good a writer you are...maybe you do,and if you don't i want to take you by the shoulders and shake you up and say this is great writing.To me it is.Whenever i read you,i feel i am simply standing invisible and observing you as you carry out your day to day chores and life as such.What i want to say is that is how genuine your words are,that they are palpable.You are not shy of showing the world that look this is how i am and this is the life i lead.You want the reader to embrace you and your words in their light and in their darkness.
The first stanza,
Through the bluster of wind
the rain smacking against the windowpane…
A collage of lonely sounds
In the otherwise quiet night…When you say 'collage of lonely sounds in the quiet night'..what a beautiful phrase you have etched out.Someone with a precise and discerning observation,in tune with one's silence could do that.
Ah! and those three lines,I feel like a faded photograph
Collecting dust and cracking with age
In the mothball odor of stale attic walls.
those lines could altogether make a new poem..:)..they are gonna get stuck in my head for a very long time.
When you start with 'Our love has become as moldy as the...your poem starts capturing the essence you had set out for... and they touched me as you went on to tell so very candidly about a failing relationship.Isn't it with all aspects of us..and not only relationships,whatever we start to enervate in,fail in..we chose to fall in its comfortable routine rather than stand up and confront.
Any day now the walls will cave in

And we’ll have no choice but to
Dig our way out…
Back into life.

Thank you for sharing...a very well written poem.

[Jonathan Ballam]

This is a very mature and graceful write. You seem to sculpt those inner voices and feelings we all share.

I look forward to reading more of your work ;)

[Coyote Poetry]

I understand the words in your poem. Time turn things that were good to old and dusty. It is hard to find the way back. I don't know what can be done. Maybe time support to change us. Less caring and needing less attention. A powerful poem. The story was powerful and seem real. I like the hopeful ending. Maybe we support to want or need less? A outstanding poem. You made me think.
Coyote

[Ruth]

This capture a devastation, a relationship in turmoil, really well! Beautifully so :)
We are left with no choice but to dig our way out of the situation even though its hard, life doesn't stand still!
I love this poem, elegantly expressed and very poignant
xx

[Ladysue]

This is some writing. Really able to reach the reader...the first verse drew me right in. You capture a failing relationship with such finesse and insight. Excellent...

[NoneOfYourBusiness akaK..]

breathtaking experience~ pulled in deep~

[Delightful Writer]

Amazing piece:)

[Pauline Marie Daley]

I love the last stanza. Sometimes life does get way too bad. To hard to fix or even attempt to fix. But without dealing with it, one day it will all crash and burn and then the only thing left to do is to start over. Awesome piece. :-)

[Hedra Helix]

ohhh man, wow.