It's Daddy's Fault

This is just a poem of the story I wrote, coming from the Daddy's third person point of view. Hope you enjoy and please read my story :D

The girl lost her life

It's all their fault

She couldn't take it

Knowing it was her fault

She loved them

She didn't do it on purpose

"I promise, Daddy!"

She screamed when his belt made contact

With her pale skin

He left marks on her body

People called her insane

She didn't think so
She stared at the strawberry gashes

As she watched the blood pulse from her skin

Her shrill laugh would tip him off

"You're insane!"

He would scream at her

As he took off his belt

She screamed

He didn't care

Well now,

It's his fault

But he doesn't care

She ended her life to be happy

She thought her mother would love her

But her mother was gone

She killed her

So she thought

So she pressed a bloody razor to her throat

And she felt her body spiral down

Now, her father hears her screams

When he's trying to fall asleep

Her screams begging him to stop

And he grieves,

It's all his fault.

Reviews

[17thWhitePrince]

Wow !!! A very intense and powerful piece of writing for sure !!!

"Now, her father hears her screams
When he's trying to fall asleep"

Insane !!!

Well written =P

[Voice]

Very powerful message here. Leaves nothing left unsaid.

Voice

[Emo_Girl]

I loves cuzzie

[sisyqueen2008]

Whoa! This is a really good poem, you're good at what you do d(^_^)b (thumb's up lol)

[Kyle]

Nice.
I get the point made very well (And I still have to get around to reading the story, but even though I haven't read it yet, I still see the emotional flow and his point of veiw very well)
It's sad, yes.
And depressing.
But very well written!
Two thumbs up :D

[Alicante lullaby]

sad,melancholy...

[(:]

Aw.. So sad.
But it describes his point of well, well.

[A.r. Bazian]

intense!
quite intense...