Chapter One

Carissa looked up when she heard a knock on her door. It was 3:00 on a Sunday afternoon, and neither she, nor her husband, had been expecting anyone. She was in her office toward the back of her house, so she assumed her husband had let the visitor in. Bookmarking her page, Carissa stood from her desk and opened her office door. Red-shot blue eyes stared at her through a cloud of tears. Carissa widened her eyes. "Sasha! Are you okay? Come on in."
    The young woman was no longer crying, but when she spoke, the intense sadness rang out through her voice more clearly than any tears could show. "I'm not staying long. I just came to tell you goodbye. I'm leaving."
    "Leaving? You're moving? Where will you go? Did something happen with Kevin?" Carissa sat beside her friend on a small couch sitting across from her desk. She turned on a light and placed her hand over Sasha's. "Talk to me."
    Sasha shook her head and pulled her hands away. "Please don't. I'm not here to have my head shrinked. I'm not here to talk. I just wanted to say goodbye."
    But the damage had been done. "Sasha, your hands!" They were cold, clammy and shaking. Carissa looked more closely at her friend. She was pale and didn't seem to be breathing just right. "What did you do to yourself?"
    Tears welled back up in the pretty blue eyes. It almost hurt Carissa to look into such a familiar color. "Ambien. The bottle's empty. I just refilled it a few days ago."
    The words weren't even fully out of Sasha's mouth when Carissa was running toward her phone. She quickly dialed 911 and told the operator her address. "I need an ambulance here now. We have an overdose on sleeping pills." Running back to her friend's side, she called out to her husband. He was at the door quickly. "Keep the front door open. She overdosed. An ambulance is on the way. I'm not leaving her side." Carissa looked back into Sasha's eyes as they started to close. She slapped the younger girl's face a few times. "Stay with me, Sasha. Come on."
    Sasha's eyes closed and her breathing became raspy. Carissa could hear the wail of the ambulance coming up her street, so she laid Sasha down and held tightly to her hand. Paramedics came rushing in, lifting Sasha onto a stretcher and asking Carissa questions. She answered mindlessly, following them outside until they tried to stop her from getting into the ambulance. "I'm going with her!" she exclaimed, fire jumping to her eyes. The paramedics started to say no, but she jumped up. "I'm allowed to. I'm the closest thing to family she has right now."
    The door's shut behind her, the medics deciding Sasha's health was more important than stopping Carissa from being in the ambulance. The ride to the hospital was quicker than she expected, and before she knew it, the doors were open and Sasha was being wheeled away. Carissa felt arms wrap around her from behind and turned into the hug, already recognizing the warmth of her husband. "She'll be okay, honey. I promise. Come on, let's sit down and wait for the doctor."
    Hesitantly, Carissa allowed herself to be moved from the spot on the floor where she'd been standing, watching the operating room doors. For an hour, her eyes didn't move from the set of swinging doors. Finally, a doctor emerged and walked toward them. "Are you two here for Sasha Matos?" Carissa nodded wearily. "She'll be okay. We pumped her stomach and we have her on an IV in a room. I'll take you there now."
    "She's going to recover fine?" Carissa felt her husband squeeze her hand.
    "Physically, she'll never be able to use Ambien again, and her liver is permanently damaged. But it's the emotional aspect I'm more worried about. Overdoses on sleeping pills aren't usually accidental." The doctor stopped in front of a room with a closed door. "She's right here. We gave her a sedative, so she'll probably be out for the night. You two should get some sleep. If you're going to spend the night here, we can always send in a couple of collapsible cots." He turned and walked away after Carissa nodded in response and the couple entered the room.
    There was an IV attached to Sasha's arm and the woman looked peaceful. "She almost looks happy." Carissa looked up at her husband. He had spoken what was going through her mind. He kissed his wife's forehead. "It'll be okay."
    "I can't stop thinking about it. So many years ago... what a smack in the face." Carissa started mumbling incoherently, her eyes shutting after the hectic night. Her husband was muttering quiet reassurances as her stroked her arm, lulling her into sleep.
    She didn't sleep though. She remembered.