the begining of vengence

DARK DECEPTION SAGA
RATORI'S VENGEANCE    
chapter one: the beginning of vengeance


    The smell of burning flesh and putrid smoke filled his nose as he slowly walked unto the horrible scene. Green flames licked hungrily at the log buildings of his beloved village, his home gone. Oh, dear Creator  his home, his family. His wife and two children were home sleeping when he had departed. He prayed to the good spirits that they were safe. Urgency guiding his feet he briskly ran towards the green pyre that was his home, a feeling of dread forcing itself into his already confounded mind.
    Getting as close as he dared to the unearthly flames he peered though a blazing window. He couldn't breath, this wasn't happening. Anguish chocked him breathless as he laid his eyes upon the lifeless forms of his wife and children sprawled upon the floor. He knew he was to late, they were beyond his saving. Shock crumpled him to the ground from the unholy sight. Who would do this to a peasant village, to people who would never harm anyone? A people of peace and caring, no one deserved such a fate as this. The putrid smoke filled his lungs, stinging his eyes. Far above him the dark smoke turned a crimson red blowing headlong toward the mountains to the east. It had to be some sort of foul magic, no one in the kings army could produce such life hating flames. The flames themselves seemed feed but the underworld. He started weeping, his whole life ruined, his family dead. The world went black around him casting him into the silence of nothing.
    In his sleep he screamed of their agony. Dreaming of a black shadow looming wraith-like over the village laughing as green flames flew violently out of his hands unto what was once his home. People ran screaming out of their homes carrying their children, the green flames descending upon them. Creatures darker then the abyss hunting down those lucky enough not to burn. They tore at their bodies with reckless abandon leaving nothing in their wake. Nothing could escape such evil that night, the innocent like moths to a light, swallowed up by evil they
    It was darkness when he awoke, the blazing green fires now smoldering piles of crimson embers. His head pounded from the ache the felt in his heart. Slowly rising to his knees, his head hanging like a limp child's doll. "I vow to find those who did this to you, all of you. I will avenge you for what has been done this day!" He whipped around, startled by a hand touching his shoulder. He stood and turned with unearthly speed, ready for an attack. None came instead he turned to face his child hood friend.
    A short round man stood facing him, a look of disbelief on his face. His long brown robes flaked with ashes ans soot, as though he had been digging in a fire. His plump face stark white with the exception of dark smudge marks from where he had wiped his face. "Ah so it is you Ratari, I'm so glad they didn't get you as well." He looked around at the piles of embers. "I take it they took the lives of your family. No one   else survived. I'm truly sorry my old friend, I cant imagine the suffering you must feel. Come with me, let us be away from this defiled place, the living should not be here anymore, this is a place for the dead now. May the spirits take in their souls kindly, no one deserved such a fate as this."
    "Elder Jaynath, my dear friend," almost choking on the words."I'm at a loss of words...who did this to my people? What was their crime?
    "The Emperor  from across the mountains to the east, has set his demons upon us, all of us. The free world is not safe anymore. There is nowhere to hide from him, he sees everything. He's out to conquer the world in search of  giea's flame. The good spirits save us from that day."
    "Good, then he will know that I will be coming for the bittersweet taste of vengeance.If he really can see everything. I will have his blood  on my hands after I have felt that he has suffered long enough. His death will be slow and timely, he will rue the day he was born."
    "Yes, yes. Thats all good, but in due time friend. We must hurry and be away if your to have him at the end of your sword. We must be away from here at once, more will be passing through."
    Tears slowly running down his face, he turned once again to the embers that were all that was left of his home. "No time to dig a proper grave, and not enough left to fill it. Say a prayer my friend to send them to the good spirits, my hearts too fulled with hate and sorrow for them to hear my plea." He walked to the ruins of his home, shifting his feet though the cooling embers, he bent down when he found what he was looking for. A slow smile spread to his lips as he turned toward his elder. "Long has this blade defended our people. My father used it in the last war, and his father before him, and theirs before that. Now it will serve my purpose, to protect what little hope we have left."
    A sad smile rose on the round face, pity riveting his blue eyes. "I know my child, but don't let your hate consume you or you'll become what your hunting. I know the sorrow you feel, but come we must be off. Theres a very long journey ahead of you and we cannot be here when the sun goes down and the demons return to eat the ashes of our deceased."
    "Then lets be on our way." a sudden image of some formless monstrosity  going through the remains of his life feasting sickened him. He felt the rage build up inside himself. His mind somewhere else he let Jaynath lead him towards the woods that surrounded the lost village. In the distance on the top of a rocky cliff he could see the old ruins he so often played at when he was a child.  At the edge of the woods Jaynath untied two horses from a low branch. Mounting one he pointed at the other a young stallion.
    "Up, the way is long and we're both very tired by events that have befallen us, but still we must hurry we must go on." the horses seemingly able to sense Jaynaths meaning nickered in agreement,eager to be off. The path trough the woods was dark and smelled of moss and rot, but Ratori had never felt more at home in these woods then he did now. He scanned familiar trails and paths of which he used to hunt. They trotted the horses a fair distance into the woods before slowing them to a walk so that they could dismount and lead them up the narrow path leading to the ruins that towered above them forbiddingly. Here and there lengths of ancient fallen walls poked up from tangles of vines that tryed to choke them from existence. Remments of an ancient past forgotten by many, remembered by so few.
    Through a narrow path leading back down the hill in a different direction then the had just traveled seemed to glow off in the distance. The light moving quickly towards them at a great speed, its luminescence becoming shimmering shaped then faded in and out of the trees, becoming more solid. Seconds passed, the shaped slowing and finally stopping not a mere twenty yards away. His breath escaped him. Unicorns, he could hardly believe it, seven he silently counted. The stood there regally looking at him, their blue eyes wild and nervous ready to blot at the slightest hint of trouble. The smallest but the one with the brightest shine neighed and stamped his foot impatiently, seeming to be irritated that their running had been stopped or just in a hurry to be off again. Ratori sat there as motionless as he could not wanting to frighten such beautiful and rare creatures. They seemed content with what they saw of him and his companion. They  nighed  once in unison and turned back to the forest and galloped the way they had come. They dissapeared into the distance.The resown they had come fulfilled, they had come to see the chosen one. They liked what they saw, but feared it was too much, they hurried to their herd out of sight, they would spread the news that "He " had finally come.
    Reaching the top of the tangled twisting path, they stopped to catch their breath and unpacked the horses, letting them graze on the long grass that filled the gaps between the remaining walls of the ancient fortress. They wound their way though age old rubble in silence, their footsteps muffled in the tall grass. Their riding cloaks swishing  as they rubbed the tops of green blades, silence except the sounds they made.
Death hung about them like flies to a bloated corpse.
    "Here, Jaynath is where we will be staying the night, I know this place, no demons will come hunting us here, this be ancient hallowed ground." He laid his pack on the ground next to the remains of a statue to worn and broken to tell what it once was, its stone covered in green flowering moss. "You'll take first watch, wake me when the moon reaches the towers." pointing to the left where two towers that once stood tall and proud. They  now stood sadly without roofing and the top walls, watching over the remains of their once beloved fortress. Sighing he sat down and laid his head against his pack, he laid his sword across himself and slipped almost instantly into a horror haunted sleep. Time seemed meaningless to him now, all there was was darkness. To soon it seemed he was being woke up, he sat up as he watched his old friend take his earned rest.
    "Jaynath, why would the demons return to eat the ashes? I've been thinking about all this while we were riding up here and it doesn't make very much sense. I mean how could the Emperor come to have this power, and whats this giea's flame I don't understand how this all goes together."
    "Child I do not know much on this matter, but I shall tell you what is know to me. The Emperor wasn't always like this, he was once loved by his people. He ruled with justice and fairness in his heart, by doing so we won the heart to his queen. She fell very ill, and he tried everything to get her well again but it was all to no avail. Even the best healers in the lands came to see what they could do for her. The sicker she got the more worried the Emperor became of loosing her. Then an old mystic came and told him of this forgotten artifact that had the power to cure any sickness and give elongated life. He himself retrieved it from the darkest of places, and used it to heal her only to have the artifact take her life while she laid in his arms. Since that day he became more wicked and sinister. Now his only care is to bring the dead into the world of the living so he can once more be with the one he loves. I don't know what the flame of giea does but everyone know that hes been looking for it. I know he must not get ahold of it o fear we'll loose something more dear then our lives child thats why he must be stopped"
    They sat there motionless without saying anything for quite some time, looking at each other trying to determine what was in the others heart. Finally Jaynath rose and went to his bedroll.   
    "I'm going to make a couple rounds, sleep well old friend." but the quite snoring told him his friend had already fallen asleep. The crescent moon dipping away out of his sight beyond the towers, no longer able to sit still anymore he was glad for a chance to stretch his legs and go for a short walk. Such a beautiful night he thought, despite everything that had happened the night before he felt a calm in this place. Here was where he played games with his friends when he was a child, But never before did he remember it being so lonely. No longer did he hear the laughter echoing though time, instead their was a silence that brought a slight chill to his heart.
    Dragging his rough fingertips along the wall of the smooth white stones of the first tower, dreaming about his past. He looked to the sleeping form of his friend Jaynath. He laid there quite still, lost in his own subconscious thoughts that gripped him away from the reality of being awake. Ratori smiled, at least one person he knew was safe and well. Ratori continued to walk the perimeter of the fallen walls, hundreds of feet long, he was glad to be able to stretch his legs. His hand touched the cold blue steel of his sword, so familiar to his hand.  A habit of making sure it was clear in its scabbard,  it rang beautifully when he slid it back into its home.
    Quick movement caught his eye near the ivy overgrown crystal fountain in the center of the ruined town square. He stood there wondering what it could have been, when suddenly a white glowing childlike shape materialized from the nothingness of the shadows. With a hand it seemed to beckon him forward. He felt his feet step forward of their own doing. The glowing shape grew clearer and less abstract, it was a female child. She smiled at him and gestured for him to come closer, she turned away her long white curls bouncing as she  glided through the long grass, he feet never touching the ground.
    He followed without ever knowing just quite why he felt the obligation to do so. She seemed so lonely, he somehow thought he knew her, a different place a different time perhaps but he was at a loss to place his finger on it. She vanished into the small patch of trees on the inside of the rock wall. He followed, knowing the spot she was leading him. A small wooden bench surrounded by vines and ancient trees, it always amazed him that it had lasted though all this time of neglect. Its delicate flower caving still in tacked making the place look even more regal, such beauty radiated from the carvings. She sat there smile still on her face waiting expectantly, he stopped not knowing if he should come closer without an invitation. Again she motioned him to come closer, again his feet worked without his consent, a chill welled up within himself. One step, two, three steps he counted, the chill now feeling like an icy hand gripping his heart. Four steps, and then there was nothing as he plunged though a dark hole in the ground he never knew was there.
    He fell tumbling and sliding though a smooth shaft made of the same rocks of the towers. He rolled into a ball covering his head, fearing he would crack his skull as he gained momentum as he plummeted thought the darkness. He rolled and fell for what seemed like forever, his now very bruised body finally crashing onto a solid ground. he opened his eyes peering into the darkness, nothing is what he saw. Disoriented he fell, dizzy from the fall and lightheaded from getting up to quickly. his head hit one of the smooth rock that littered the floor, darkness engulfed him. He slipped away from the world of the living, and slept a deeper sleep then he ever knew was possible. What scared him the most was that he had heard Jaynath screaming in agony as he had fell.
    Days later it seemed to him he woke up. The darkness no more, the white light once again returned, the smiling child standing  over him. Her eyes peered into his, seemingly to see his soul, a very child like smile appeared on her face, then  with a very childish voice she laughed.

Reviews

[TLK]

The first sentence is an absolute deal-breaker. Using the word 'unto' elevates it into parody.

Fantasy fiction has a lot to answer for. It probably makes more cliches than a factory makes sausages (specifically a sausage factory).