[untitled]

Chapter 1
Leaving Town

Rain pounded on the little gray hut on the outskirts of the village. Ace the vampires eyes flew open at the sound of the dreadful and annoying rain outside, which had been awakening him until he gave up trying to sleep. He got up and off his dark bed, which was on the verge of breaking. He walked slowly to the single window in his house, he and tapped open the worn wooden shutters that blocked the wind and rain from coming in. A gust of fresh winter air rushed in and cooled the heat of his home. Ace stared outside to the forest, his world had utterly changed in the last year from living in the palace of Ramondoom to a small hut where he barely made enough to buy meat for himself. Ace was royalty but, when his father had died everything had changed even his brother, who had taken the throne and commanded that Ace be thrown out to the Gutters.

Ace still remembered it clearly, he was staring at his fathers freezing hand as he had gripped him for the last time, trying very hard his father had been able to mumble "I want the next king to be..." his father had not even finished the sentence when he had died. His brother Spade had decided that he was going to be his fathers successor, although Ace had supported him and even stepped aside knowing that Spade would be a much more capable king than him, he had even supported Spade by telling the angry crowds that only the old supported the older one to be king and only because the old wanted to be in power, Ace, but he wasn’t ready to be king so he had calmed the people and told them that his brother was the successor even though the majority had wanted him to take control. A month later Spade was named the king to the Romandoom and Ace was thrown to the streets of Romandoom. He guessed that his brother was afraid that he would attempt to take the throne, he thought it was foolish of him, to even consider that since Ace had offered Spade the throne in the first place. He remembered the times when Spade and him would go hunting together they were so peaceful and carefree, on the horsebacks they would ride to mountainous areas just the two of them and battle with wild beast‘s. Spade had always asked him for advice from since Ace could remember, but when he became king everything had changed. Ace moved towards the center of the village thinking what had he done wrong, he had let his brother become the king and as a result he was living in the gutters and working at a blacksmith so that he could eat the one meal he ate every week. It was not even the meat he ate at home which was human but an animals meat.

His ears sensed the change before it happened, a rumble in the distance, it was the immortal army, as quick as lightening Ace tossed his head from left to right searching for any warriors that were in sight but there, were none. It was probably the frontier that was moving his way. It was obvious that the army was searching for him, it had been ever since he had left Romandoom. His brother had tried to kill him by starving him on the streets of Romandoom, all because of his fear that Ace would someday reclaim the throne and get revenge for throwing him out. The kingdom his brother held so proudly wasn't even appealing to Ace and he knew the people of Romandoom would revolt if he did take control of the capital . He had worked hard and saved aliyak knowing that it was a matter of time before Spade would strike another one of the villages, Ace had lived in. Each month Ace would move to a village and have to start from scratch. He flew by a old vamp as he rushed inside of his one room hut. He grabbed his sword and bow, and the little aliyak that he had been able to save for a time like this, he had been planning to move ever since he had arrived here on a cold and gloomy night starving he had fell in front of a door in dealth forest. He could feel the ground shake and see the wooden doors vibrate as the army moved in a perfect way. He knew that Spade was beginning to think that the whole world was revolving around him.

Ace had become accustomed to Kielsian, an old vampire who had said “when you move take me with you, you’re like the son I never had” it had been his door that he had fallen in front of. Kielsian was still close to Ace's heart like a father, at times even more so yet he still missed the good old days though when Spade and his family had all lived in harmony. He knew Kielsian would die for him, if he needed it. Both he and Kielsian had been planning to move ever since the beginning, and now the time had come for them to act on it. He ran towards Kielsian house which was deep in the dark green forest, in front of him. His body collided against the gate which shattered on contact causing Ace to fall to the ground. “Kielsian” Ace yelled, his face flooding with fear because of the advancing army.

“what’s going on?, what’s wrong Ace?, why did you break the door?” Kielsian questioned, not realizing the up coming danger. His oval smiling face now changed to an enraged face his fangs bare and he let a loud growl slip between his teeth, as he heard the distant rumble of the army. “I’ll get my stuff” Kielsian continued now looking heart broken.

“You can stay hear if you want but I gotta go, so if your not ready, to move I understand” Ace said, looking equally as sad. Ace managed to give Kielsian a sour looking smile, knowing how much he would missing the forest, the village, the birds, and even that annoying rain.

“No, I'm....coming with you, I want you to be safe, I just wasn't expecting this now" Kielsian said with a cold face. Kielsian rushed to his sword preparing to run but in case of a battle, he was prepared to fight till the end.

Reviews

[Markymark]

Like this. Why untitled. Third person was an excellent choice. I love this para:


His ears sensed the change before it happened, a rumble in the distance, it was the immortal army, as quick as lightening Ace tossed his head from left to right searching for any warriors that were in sight but there, were none. It was probably the frontier that was moving his way. It was obvious that the army was searching for him, it had been ever since he had left Romandoom. His brother had tried to kill him by starving him on the streets of Romandoom, all because of his fear that Ace would someday reclaim the throne and get revenge for throwing him out. The kingdom his brother held so proudly wasn't even appealing to Ace and he knew the people of Romandoom would revolt if he did take control of the capital . He had worked hard and saved aliyak knowing that it was a matter of time before Spade would strike another one of the villages, Ace had lived in. Each month Ace would move to a village and have to start from scratch. He flew by a old vamp as he rushed inside of his one room hut. He grabbed his sword and bow, and the little aliyak that he had been able to save for a time like this, he had been planning to move ever since he had arrived here on a cold and gloomy night starving he had fell in front of a door in dealth forest. He could feel the ground shake and see the wooden doors vibrate as the army moved in a perfect way. He knew that Spade was beginning to think that the whole world was revolving around him.

Great transition.

Vampires are not my normal genre...but it kept my interest until the end.

Thank you for posting this. I will read the next chapter...

Markymark