The Affair

My eyes opened to the sunlight streaming through the skylights
Measured steps down the stairs, looking at the clock ahead
Only seconds from my bed, my head felt like molten lead
The clock face measured its time, a face of pearl white.

Time felt heavy, laden with cool spring air,
Why did I settle?  Why did I choose security?
I was weak, timid, full of cowardice and despair
It's a long story, not to be told hurriedly.
 
My fortune lays before me in full sunlight
I bought time with money and security over doing right
Entering the prison I closed the gate behind
Now I bide my time, watching the affair unwind.

She knew what she was doing, she did it for herself
Transactional in nature, love nowhere near the scene
Rumors begin to whirl like dervishes as they preen
Affected, I watched them like a doll on a shelf.

She was out for power, he the dominant creditor
As they slipped out nightly, ever more brazen
Like animals that knew no natural preditors
They preyed on the world together, just craven.

But time unwinds all things, ourselves and each other
Wind-up toys begin to slow, then stop altogether
The heaviness begins to build, as time takes hold
Lust turning to fear, fear of what's being told.

They'll sell out each other, but the cavity is formed
No undoing the damage, relationships are torn
As I sit watching them I mourn
Wishing they were never born. 

The clock's pearl white face shows ambivalence
Knowing deep down that all is solved in time
My despair is turning to hope, no need to pine
Finding new courage, my fortune is benevolent. 

The die cast years ago finally came to rest.