Let Us Talk About Perfection

Should we all have to be "perfect"? Of course not. Yet there are those of us, as grown adults, who do believe that we have to be at least a little bit perfect. I worry for them.

 

Let Us Talk About Perfection

 

 

     Yesterday we talked...you and I. You said you thought none of us needed to be perfect people.  I said that I thought it would be okay to try and be perfect with just one little thing or two such as not chewing gum in public or only eating dark chocolate.  No milk chocolate.  Not even one little Hershey Kiss all wrapped up and twisted tight in shiny silver foil with the little white tag sticking out the top.  Only dark. You seemed to think about what I said but your tone, when you said, "Uh...oh...okay," didn't sound convincing to me.  I know that you were not allowed to chew gum at all when you were growing up.  Your father, a doctor, forbid you to drink anything until your meals were finished and you had swallowed your last bite.  You were spanked often to help you learn how to be perfect but perhaps sometimes a little too hard or a little too long.  It was the same for me growing up.  My father was not a doctor.  He was a military officer.  Not much difference in their views on raising children to be perfect people.  I got my mouth washed out with soap for speaking what I considered to be the truth.  I felt the sting of my father's yardstick more than I want to remember, pee running down the insides of my thighs and wetting the cuffs of my white anklets.  The look in my father's eyes was enough.  He really didn't need the yardstick to convince me that I had to try harder at behaving perfectly.  My mother did her best to instill perfection in me as well.  If my bed was not made correctly, that is without lumps and with everything tucked in, then it was ripped apart in order for me to start over.  When my mother checked my dresser drawers they had to be neat and tidy otherwise she dumped them on the floor in my bedroom while I was still at school.  No need for the yardstick.  It took me all evening to put my clothes back into my drawers perfectly neatly.  We were raised to be careful and good and to do our very best to be perfect.  You and I were brought up that way.  If you think it is just fine, now, for people to not worry about trying to be perfect...well, that's okay.  As for me...I think I will at least try to be perfect at one little thing or two.

Author's Note

Not finely edited.

Reviews

[Jeril]

**sigh** I am getting better at not trying to be perfect...it's been a long journey and struggle continues each day.....We're fine, sis, just the way we are.

[jeril]

It was hard to have two perfectionist parents, huh? I'm still trying to get past that....again, your work is so good, Chris. I'm proud.

[Zachary_James]

Great

[Samuel Dickens]

An interesting conversation between you and....? Very well written. I think it's wrong of a parent or other authority figure to insist on perfection from others in the way that you described. That can only do harm, I believe, but to set high standards for one's self and to strive for perfection in certain areas is something altogether different. Think of doctors---wouldn't you prefer one who's a perfectionist performing your heart surgery?