I could not look away

I could not look away

A Poem by Jack...
"

Inspired by Frieda's "Echoes of your stare" and the magical music that accompanied it...

"


I could not look away

 

I fell into the nightmares of a lover’s distant past

While the whispers in the darkness brought the spell her heart did cast

As it raked across my feelings and I cried out in the night

Did this smile I was wearing fit a little bit too tight

With her nails now painted crimson like the color of my blood

She could walk on my emotions as the silhouettes did flood

 

This the morning of believing that our time is filled with fate

And I find myself now screaming, please don’t tell me it’s too late

She collected every quarter on the number I did call

For she wanted me to know that I could never have it all

Still I crawled into the darkness with my eyes so open wide

And together we were drowning in the motion of the tide

 

In her eyes was every second of the minutes I could spare

Like a clock that’s steady ticking heartbeat rhythms sent to share

Drinking thirsty from the fountain as her finger it did press

On the chrome implanted wishes of an early moon confess

When I looked off in the distance and her beauty it did play

It delivered an affection and I could not look away

 

© 2014 Jack...


Author's Note

Jack...
Thank you for reading

My Review

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Reviews

It gives me a dreamy, magical feeling that "I could not look away" from this piece. Beautiful, Jack.

Posted 10 Years Ago


I love everything you write .It is always filled with emotion and comes from the heart.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Jack...

10 Years Ago

Thank you so very much Vidya. I always appreciate your sweet words to me.
Vidya Bacchus

10 Years Ago

You are welcome my friend.
This is not your typical style Jack, I'm not saying that is a bad thing by any means, I just feel it's important you know I think that before I review. One thing that sells this to me, is that it is stripped raw of addition and editorialize, a very well written piece, maybe I can advise you to keep up with this style, even if only privately, certainly something to research, well done!

Posted 10 Years Ago


Jack...

10 Years Ago

Thanks Thomas, I do try to change my style and approach from time to time. I know most on here see m.. read more
Thomas Fitzgerald

10 Years Ago

Indeed Jack, it's odd isn't it, all of my published work is farce and comedy, where on here I am see.. read more
Just magnificently done, Jack. We never know what may spark our own brilliance!

Posted 10 Years Ago


Jack...

10 Years Ago

Thanks so very much my friend. Frieda's "Echoes of your Stare" inspired this.
Beautifully written....
-Dragon

Posted 10 Years Ago


Jack...

10 Years Ago

Thank you again for your kindness
I'm glad I paused here this morning. You had a lot that needed saying AND being heard.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Jack...

10 Years Ago

Thanks so much Chris. I am happy you paused here as well.
Chris

10 Years Ago

Coffee helps on a Monday.
Nicely done Jack. Enjoyed it.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Jack...

10 Years Ago

I appreciate it Mark.
As usual, I loved this one. The imagery is great. Good job my dear friend

Posted 10 Years Ago


Jack...

10 Years Ago

Thank you Sunshine.
There is something eerily divine in this poem, Jack. Wonderfully crafted!

Posted 10 Years Ago


Jack...

10 Years Ago

Thank you Rita.
"Like a clock that’s steady ticking heartbeat rhythms sent to share"

Beautiful.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Jack...

10 Years Ago

Thank you so very much Emma for your kind words.
Emma Grace Tennyson

10 Years Ago

Anytime. :)

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583 Views
18 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on January 18, 2014
Last Updated on January 18, 2014

Author

Jack...
Jack...

San Antonio, TX



About
Not much to tell about me, I am just Jack, I am a poet, a writer, a musician, a painter, a builder and a dreamer. I live in south Texas but am originally from New Jersey and miss it more and more all .. more..

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