Caffeine, blood and thoughts

Sadness, it can take its toll

 

 

 

 

 

 

Caffeine, blood and thoughts

 

For is this the sunrise, I ask

as my eyes fall open in disbelief,

collecting symptoms of another day of

forgoing dreams I might have had,

had I slept

 

This pencil thin line of tangerine

silently slithers its way

into my world,

like a snake stretched across

the horizon, coiled in the center

and prepared to strike

 

The pain cuts deep of artery pinpricks,

always wanting to be ~ in my time,

and wondering if the next

cup of coffee will do the trick

 

Caffeine, blood and thoughts,

not always the best combination,

like razors and these old envelopes~

which hold the letters,

yellowed like this belligerent sky...

you remember, you sent them

when I was something

(in your life)

 

Now a straight red line calls to me,

"look down," it shouts,

see what you have done to yourself

 

Though I have done nothing,

for I am nothing...(your words, not mine)

under your breath

as you slammed the door behind you

 

And I can not look, for what was

holds my attention... 

besides, it is only a wrist, I have another,

attached to my other hand,

the one holding the razor...

 

one last cup of coffee...I think

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

Thank you for reading

Reviews

[icelandicblue]

This is such a tortured poem. Sometimes coffee can be a contemplative drink where we muse over our lives. There are many who have faced this demon down and others who have not. I think your poem speaks to the myriad of thoughts that must run through someones mind while wondering how far they can/will go. We are a muddled mess sometimes and this speaks to how difficult life can really be.

[Jack...]

Thanks Blue, I appreciate your comments on this. It is purely imagination talking from my side

[icelandicblue]

I knew that! I used that same picture for a poem I wrote once. : )

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

A heavy write, my friend. I love the power in the lines, that are melted beautifully with the tortured, somber beauty. Sometimes the simplest times are the times when things hit us the hardest...I sometimes find that when I'm the most quiet in my mind, I'm the most tortured, that's just me. Well written.

[Jack...]

Thank you so very much my friend. I always appreciate hearing from you.

[I, Rene]

I have never been a cutter, and I am too afraid of the sight of my own blood to even consider it, though I know there are many who hurt themselves that way. I knew someone who cut, she said if the pain on the outside is greater than the pain on the inside it somehow makes it all bearable. sad poem extremely well done.

[Jack...]

Thank you so very much my friend. I am not a cutter either.

[Frieda P]

This captures tortured desperation and angst to perfection...funny how you can think of such extremes over a cup of coffee, because after a while those thoughts are just commonplace and at times the only way to deal with a defeated soul. This one cuts deeps no pun intended, and moves me to dark emotions. You've taken your poetry to a whole new level Jack.

[Jack...]

Thanks so much my sweet friend. It is funny how the mind thinks at times. I appreciate you.

[Angi]

I want to scream,' NO!' at the end. So, so haunting, Jack!

[Jack...]

Thanks so much my friend.

[Rita L. Sev]

Jack, reading this makes my heart heavy - heartbreak and heartache so complete, despair so wrapped in what another thinks of us, has done to us... An excelent poem, for its ability to completely create a mood.

[Jack...]

Thanks so much Rita. I am pleased it made you feel something

[wynn]

The struggle, the temptation to do self-harm...wondering if there is some alternative...each monotonous day drags on, the only thing to contemplate is the darkest thought...
This is a very sad and deep poem. I love the combination, "caffeine, blood and thoughts." It very accurately describes emotional turmoil.

[Jack...]

Thanks so much. Fortunately it doesn't accurately describe my state of mind.

[wynn]

You write it so well it's as if you are familiar with it.

[Jack...]

I have a grand imagination and I pay attention to what goes on around me, my friend.

[Zahra]

Caffeine, blood and thoughts,

not always the best combination,

Very nice.
It's very sad, song of a languishing heart. We try move ahead in our lives, trying to leave the pain behind. But it finds it's way back from many direction, slithering into our world. Beautiful write.

[Jack...]

Thank you very much.

[QuietlyCrash]

Wow, I can't even tell you how much this breaks my heart. To be honest I've actually struggled with self harm for quite sometime during my 'awkward' years and this poem, captures perfectly, the feeling of hopelessness that comes with outward pouring of pain. Thank you so much for writing this, I adore it.
Have a lovely evening,
Riley :)

[Jack...]

Thank you so very much Riley

[QuietlyCrash]

Anytime, thank you for this poem. :)