For something more than love

For something more than love

A Poem by Jack...
"

"Make love not war"

"

 

For something more than love

by jack

 

Trenches dug, a mile deep

My body it is sore

Firm against the lies that seep

Beneath the sliding door

 

Crevices of mounting hate

Stand the borderline

Quietly I sit and wait

A distant church bell chimes

 

Thunder falls from every cloud

Children run and hide

Barricades inform the crowd

To walk the other side

 

Sticks and stones and broken bones

Phrases fired back

Insults from the words have grown

Now arming the attack

 

Strangers in the circus tent

Clowns to fill the car

Popcorn quotes, the need to vent

This now has gone too far

 

Raise the flag, your colored choice

Wave it high above

Think before you use your voice

For something more than love

© 2013 Jack...


Author's Note

Jack...
Thank you for reading

My Review

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Reviews

Perfect. (: I love the theme, and the poem itself! Excellent work, once again!! ^_^

Posted 11 Years Ago


Jack...

11 Years Ago

Thank you so very much.
If there was more thinking and less speaking this world would improve so much. This is a wonderful piece.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Jack...

11 Years Ago

Thank you so much Constance.
It's an impeccable, riveting read Jack. I wrote a review for this already and it ended up in the cyber abyss somewhere, just wanted you to know how moved I was by your words...last line is killer, yes think.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Jack...

11 Years Ago

Thanks so much Frieda. I truly appreciate your kind words always.
Poerful write Jack... "Sticks and stones and broken bones
Phrases fired back" "Strangers in the circus tent
Clowns to fill the car" I feel this is like a prequel to divorce maybe?? loved it.. Rose

Ric asked if you're going to read Friday.. Read where Friday?

Posted 11 Years Ago


Jack...

11 Years Ago

Thank you Rose. It is a radio show out of Denver. I will send you the info if you like.
shallimarRose

11 Years Ago

please, yes .. I use to do blog talk radio on Thursdays but Thursdays are difficult for me.. ty
WWI. A Soldier's horror unsurpassed in barbarity. Living and dying in those trenches with Rats, Chats and death all around you. They used to bury bodies in the sides of the trenches when artillery barrages wouldn't let them move the dead and rats would feast on them and run everywhere. The 1918 Influenza epidemic killed millions of people world wide and it got it's start in those horrible death filled trenches. Outstanding poem Jack. One of your finest. I feel honored to have read it.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Jack...

11 Years Ago

Wow, Thank you Mark. I appreciate you taking the time to write such a compelling review.
Wow my brother well thought out, a good flow and well presented, Tell me you are reading this one on friday? I hope so this was good, if you had your heart set on another I will let you do two pieces but I love this one!

Posted 11 Years Ago


Jack...

11 Years Ago

Thanks so much my friend. I did promise Veronica I would read a poem titled, "Yesterday Dreams" but .. read more
J Todd Underhill

11 Years Ago

Read them both then?
Jack...

11 Years Ago

Thanks, look for me.
We are complex beings. Would it be so that peace would reign I would gladly close my eyes in its warmth. We have not yet evolved to embrace these ideas beyond our own limitations, but perhaps there is hope.

Posted 11 Years Ago


Jack...

11 Years Ago

Indeed there is and most of the time it is all we have. Thank you so much.
An intriguing poem of evocative imagery worth rereading. I didnt think the sticks and stones verse had value and purpose but slightly dtracted with even more mystery but not in a skillful way. Didnt like the rhyming of borderline and chimes. Maybe borderlines? Good stuff and well done

Posted 11 Years Ago


Jack...

11 Years Ago

Thanks so much
Beautiful poem, truly. Rhymes managed very well for such short lines.

Question: Have you considered making the pronouns plural? "We" instead of "I"? This poem is strong enough that it could carry the weight of a more prophetic voice, the single poet speaking about the experience of many. Just something to play around with in revisions :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


Jack...

11 Years Ago

Thank so much, I will think about that.
Sticks and stones and broken bones

I really loved this line. And wow, let's absolutely think before we speak. We live in a world where people can hide behind a keyboard and bully someone to a point of suicide. There is a lot of hate spewed everyday, we should make it our goal to go out and spread love, and acceptance, and always think before we speak

Posted 11 Years Ago


Jack...

11 Years Ago

Thank you so much

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1479 Views
29 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 1 Library
Added on April 15, 2013
Last Updated on April 15, 2013
Tags: Hate, battle, war

Author

Jack...
Jack...

San Antonio, TX



About
Not much to tell about me, I am just Jack, I am a poet, a writer, a musician, a painter, a builder and a dreamer. I live in south Texas but am originally from New Jersey and miss it more and more all .. more..

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