Shadows hung

The world is darkest when you find it impossible to forgive yourself

Shadows hung

by jack

 

 

Desperate on this darkest star

In stagnant air to breathe

Jagged reach of tended far

So much I can’t believe

 

A’ chained upon the barricade

Locked this welded form

Broken of mistakes I’ve made

Waiting on the storm

 

As here upon my knees I weep

Head within my hands

Crying tears forever keep

Aside from promised plans

 

My heart now sliced in silent view

The end beckons me home

This which I have done to you

My life it sits alone

 

Shadows hung on shouldered fall

Mud encrusts my feet

Pain besets this lonely call

As endless sorrows seep

 

“I’m sorry”, echoes in my head

Engulfed in rhythm’d flow

Offered of a broken man

Who prays for you to know

 

Pleadings from this sectioned seat

I beg with all I am

Calling out in sad repeat

This empty place I stand

 

I ask for your forgiveness

Myself I can’t forgive

This punishment lies endless

Of fractured days I live

 

The pain is ever coming

Though nothing I shall share

I face the sun so stunning

In hopes that you are there

 

But still the time is passing

Sand in glass does fall

Desolate amassing

And I deserve it all

Author's Note

Thank you for reading

Reviews

[s y e]

This was such a powerful write, you really got in to it. It's thick with emotion and quite thought provoking.

Very deep, an excellent write, Jack!

[Jack...]

You have brought many of my poems back up from the deep...I appreciate your sweet words and your friendship Sye.

[Constance Payne]

WoW...there is so much emotion within these words that lead the imagination to wonder exactly what s/he is sorry for and what all s/he is receiving. Heart wrenching the pain that is so revealed here.
Excellent expression of desperation.

[Jack...]

Thanks so very much Constance. You kind words are always what makes me smile.

[DCT ponderings]

So I am sure I have told you this before but I love you use of rhyme. It flows so effortlessly. I never seem to be able to achieve this so tend to shy away from it. All actions have consequences. What a great piece or remorse.

My favorite two stanzas:

My heart now sliced in silent view
The end beckons me home
This which I have done to you
My life it sits alone

and

“I’m sorry”, echoes in my head
Engulfed in rhythm’d flow
Offered of a broken man
Who prays for you to know

[Jack...]

Thank you so very much my friend. I truly appreciate your kind words to me.

[carol burgess romance]

waiting for forgivness....sad write but so very well done

[Jack...]

Thank you Carol, I guess they all can't be love poems. :)

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

A probbing piece that relates a certain telling of the soul, well done.

[Jack...]

Thanks so much Thomas

[Kristin Lee]

To forgive yourself is one of the hardest things in the world. This piece is heartbreaking. The last stanza was like a tidal wave washing over the senses. Great job Jack.

[Jack...]

Wow, so much I thank you Kristin. Coming from an amazing writer such as yourself, that is a wonderful compliment

[icelandicblue]

Oh- this is heartbreaking. So often people don't acknowledge their mistakes and instead blame others. It takes a true man or woman to stand up and say forgive me- and mean it from the bottom of their souls. This poem is beautifully written and we have all made mistakes, none of us is perfect, and we must live with those mistakes. The true measure of character is how we choose to live with those mistakes and taking responsibility for our own actions. The world would be a better place if pride and ego did not get in the way. Forgiving ourselves, well, that is truly one of the most difficult struggles for a person who comes from a place of good and kindness. This is sad and it has affected me on many levels. You are a master poet Jack.

[Jack...]

Thank you so much Anne. I truly appreciate your comments from the bottom of my heart.

[Emily B]

we can't move on until we forgive, it is non-negotiable

[Jack...]

Thank you Emily, but in this case you are wrong, we can move on without forgiving because that exit door is always open.

[Emily B]

maybe i am wrong, but we come back again to the beginning if we do not learn the lesson, there is no escape

[Jack...]

Indeed, it will haunt us forever, or at least some of us, but still we can close the door behind us and learn to live with the hauntings of our past...I suppose.

[Emily B]

what we don't deal with will manifest in other ways, autoimmune disease, cancers, etc. It is always best to clear out all the negative as quick as we can do it.

[Jack...]

It would be nice if it was that easy...some negatives don't ever go away, they just develope into bigger pictures.

[Emily B]

i never said it was easy :) sometimes quick is decades of difficult work

[Jack...]

Indeed...you are correct.

[QuietlyCrash]

"and I deserve it all"
That's like a swift punch. The whole piece had this beautiful cadence that sort of reminded me of a spell when I read it aloud. I love this one, it's very well done. Good job, Jack.

[Jack...]

Thank you so much my friend.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

Wow Jack, taken with 'Invisible' this paints a very sad and dark corner into which your creative mind has slipped. Your writing is so very expressive but I am hoping it mere poetic expression rather than fresh pain in you?

[Jack...]

Thanks John, I come and go...I usually find out when I wake up in the morning. Thanks my friend.