The day everything changed

"GET THE F**K UP" I heard John yell in my face so I opened my eyes slowly, preparing my self for what I knew would come next.SLAP! My cheek was hurting bad from where he last touched it. John is Karens (my mother) boyfreind who beats me and her so she drinks to hide the pain.My father left us when I was two and Karen was only twenty-one.Im an only child (of course) so no I have no one to relate or talk to, except Kittens who is not a cat, but my bunnie (I know, only I would name a bunnie Kittens)."Get your a*s to your sorry exscuse for a school, NOW!!!" Jonh yelled as he left my room.So I scuried aroung my little blue room looking for somthing that at least mached.I don't have a dresser so most of my clothes are usually in a pile beside my bed, but last night John and Karen had a fight so he came into my room and threw every thing at the walls.I dicided to at least make my bed so that the room wouldn't look like a total mess.After I tucked the sheets under the matress and fixed my pillow I got dressed into regular blue jeans, a tight white tanktop,and my black converse ,then I hurried out the door with Kittens in my school bag (John and Karen would never let my have a pet ,so when I found Kittens in a sewer I dicided to keep her my little secret).I walked to my school carrying Kittens in my arms (like every other day) but when I got to school every one heard that a tracker was asking for me and that I was to report to the principals office right away.Every one was looking at me like I was the cafateria food(nasty and not even worthie of the title).So in stead I ran out the school and to the public libary.I knew that no one from my school actualy goes there because there to dumb to even care about there education.So I went to the back corner where it's preaty hard to see from the front door.I sat down and pet Kitten which automaticly calmed me down a ton until I heard heavy foot steps walking my way.I looked up and a huge guy with a full cresent moon in the middle of his forhead and the marks around it made his whole tatto loook like a crown.Now I know I'm suposed to be freaked out right now but I could only focus on his crown tatto so I started laughing so hard I almost peed on my self."What is so funny?" he asked in a deep voice that reminded my of dark vador(yes, I watch star wars)."Ma'am, you need to come with me." he said in that deep voice."I'll come with you if you say...Luke, I am your father" I said truely enjoying this.He rolled his eyes and then smiled slightly while he said "Luke, I am your father".I started laughing again and stood up, shifting all Kittens weight to my left hand so I could offer my right hand for him to shake.He grabed my hand with a little to much force and I let out a little "owie" and quickly pulled back my hand, remembering John had twisted it when I came home ten minutes late from school."Did I hurt you, ma'am?" he said with a worryed look on his face."No, im just really clumsy and I fell the other day" I said which was usually what I said whenever a teacher asked about a brusie."Well come with me and I'll take you to Neferet.She's the "nurse" at the House of night and I'm sure she can do something to that wrist before it gets serious" he said grabing my bag and walking toward the entrance/exit.We walked out to the parking lot and when he stuck his keys into a super exspencive car I could only stare."Are you stil coming or are you going back on your word?" he asked sadly. "This...is...your car? " I said staring like a idiot instead of just geting in.So him being the gentlemen he is tossed my bag in the back seat then walked over to the passangers door, opened it, then gently pushed me inside.I wached him walk/jog to the other side of the car and get in.As we pulled out of the parking lot I noticed I hadn't asked him his name yet."So, whats your name?" I said looking at him while peting Kitten."I'm Lafon" he said runing a hand through his short hair."Well I'm Leylia and this is Kitten" I said peting my sleepy bunnie."You do realise thats a rabbit, right?" he said giving my a questingly look."Oh my god, your right!!!" I said like I truely didn't know, then I looked at him and starting laughing."Well first let me tell you I really belived you thought that was a cat" he said pointing to Kitten."Well then maybe I could be a actress" I said still laughing."You got the looks to be" he said mostly to himself.Then after about an hour of talking about meaningless stuff the car came to a stop and I noticed we were finally at the House of night.So I steped out of the car and with Kitten in my arms and Lafon by my side ready for a new life.

Reviews

[Pookie]

I like it!! The house of night ROCKS!!! OMFG!!! And Yeah I agree with Ryan. You are speeding it a little to fast. How about go step by step. With only like a little in each chapter, tell us more about the character and her life. And all that. And describe the school and the kids in the school, how the library looked and other things on Lafon to besides his tattoos. But Still good write. I like it.

[Ryan]

Uh...well. You need to work more on not rushing. Right now, you're kind of speeding through the whole thing. Slow down, especially in the beginning. Describe everything, the characters, the setting, the time...you need to put the reader in the world you're making. Spelling needs work too...but otherwise, good job. Just remember, it's constructive critisicm, I'm not trying to be cruel here, I just know that this story could have a lot of potential if you work it right.

[~Shadow Kissed~]

I totally love this I can't wait to read more :)

[DearWorld]

I like it so far though there are several spelling errors. But I hope to see more! XD