Empty

 

 

 

Empty

 

Empty corridors

Chambers of my

Heart beat

Where you once

Resided

 

A silent ghost

Is now companion

To the spiderwebs

Reviews

[Heromen Selena]

This is a great poem because of the way you structured your lines. The most words in a line is only three, and because of that it makes something wonderful happen. The first time you read it, you'll think that a phrase means something like "Empty corridors, Chambers of my, Heart beat." It sounds like you're describing what your heart looks like. But then when you read it with different spaces in between the words it means something different, like this "Empty, corridors Chambers of, my heart, beat." with the difference in spacing you now thinking that your heart is beating rather than a place where it beats, you know what I mean? There's a word that describes it, but I forget what it is! Anyways, it's so cool that you incorporated that in your poem. It adds to the eeriness it already had and makes the reader think about what he/she is reading. Great job :) I really liked it.

[R. L. Hill]

Thank you so much for this review! I'm glad you pick up on the differing cadences.

[Glen Yumang Manese]

Declaration of this pieces together ---
in a few lines --
yet the moment takes the reader...
and the understanding is felt...

[Ally Monique]

"A silent ghost
Is now companion
To the spiderwebs"
Unique comparison, I loved it! This poem is short but holds a lot of substance :)
Keep writing!