Here, Just Nowhere

Smoke my cigarette
Let it devour the air
Let its colors, overrun
Its beneath me to care
Seems to me both rightful
And never ever wrong
For freedom is my word
My heart's forsaken one
I feel it in my bones
Swimming amongst the shore
I feel it like a cold
Climbing amongst your core
Somewhat both trite
Yet somewhat fitting fine
To a situation in
Where your mind
Is left there, nowhere, somewhere in time

Reviews

[WynterPhoenix]

Love the last line. Very strong ending. Great job!

[karmax]

Awesome pen, I'm there, like smoke in air...floating, enjoying..loving this piece!

[realmwriter]

I feel like my mind is there right now, floating in a place it has never seen and has never known but somehow feels as if It has been there before. No not Deja Vu but something else, something akin to it but far differant. Very well done. I like this piece a lot! You give it a certain, sparkle, if you will. Yet there is a certain sadness as well, even happy notes that I detect with subsiquent readings. Bravo!

[☯]

The poem literally pushes me like the waves itself. When reading it I felt a sense of "letting go" and a laid back type of emotion. I especially love this because it says so much. It's like you've let your emotions run wild, but they never returned. The thought of being unknown, of not knowing what is going to happen next. Loved it :)

[Ripple of Aqua]

It sings like ebony keys. Beautiful.

[carmz]

the poem leaves a portrait in my mind..

this is a usual scenario of a person who is bothered by a problem in his/her mind..

a nice poem

[Victoria PoetryBunny]

Very good poem. I love that ending with that last line. Powerful.

[Dearantlers]

Wow, that is amazing. I loved the last line, "Is left there, nowhere, somewhere in time" Beautiful! Sorry it took so long for me to read your read request!

[Vinod Kumar U K]

Very nice lines and cute music also...

[Alicia Hirshey]

i love the last four lines of this. The whole thing had an overpowering tug but the last four lines make it perfect.