Mind Games

immaturity and relationships intertwined at its finest

I have never been one

Who frequently wins the game

The cards never seem 

to be on my side

and I'm left feeling just the same

Tell me I'm beautiful
then you call my foil gorgeous as the stars
Tell me you love me and miss me
Then ignore me, give me cuts that turn to scars
Call me your sweetie
And have my heart pounding loud
And then drop me again
And leave me without a sound

This cycle is brutal
And I'm caught in the riptide
Gasping for air
Just trying to survive

My mind crumbles in on itself
Trying to make sense of this mess

I'm curled on the floor
Heart aching in distress

People screaming at me
To think with my mind 
Not my heart
Other people the latter

the universe's indecision 
Is tearing me apart

I'm not a brand new toy
I've been broken and I've been used
But I'm not yours for the picking
Not one here for your entertainment

when you do so choose

Rolling the dice on my heart
Is tricky business
You cut me, you break me,
Then you try to blow me kisses

I loved you so dearly
I love you so now 

I'm screaming at you

But no words come out

You haven't heard a sound

Until you know what you want
Please, I beg just leave me be.
You told me at the start you wanted me to move on
So please, just let me be free. 

So no, Mister Dice Man

Today I don't want to play 
Your mind games are too much for me
And my sanity, I'd like very much to stay