Symbols of tyranny

Once upon a tribal time

When we dwelt on spoils and errors,

Transcendent from paroxysm of spite

A rector trounced and evaded,

Espied extended silhouettes

Through his tangerine eyes.

                              

“I create as I speak

Some unspoken legends;

Turn on the dark

For I will exhibit

A cosmos so bright that

Light will obliterate.”

 

“As you ponder in my thoughts

A serene depth of broken bonds,

You will perceive but not

That of which I forbid.”

 

“Doth inherit what ye shalt

 If it art what ye seek.”

 

The Fire and moon swirled in violet

Till an aura the stars discerned.

Motes of memories that lay moribund,

Purled and transmigrated in a maelstrom.

Few flashes of stupor

Of an epileptic fit elfish face

Buckled against the heart of waves.

 

A torrent of thoughts echoed

Through the ears of life,

To bare a bedlam of beatitude.

A violet volition of vain lust

Had subdued within forever.

 

“Such are dairies of teenage odyssey

(Symbols of tyranny)

They perish before they begin.

Such was mine and so will be yours

For we slumber in chaos- meekly.”

 

 

“Thy scorching swirls hast tasted fire

and shalt inherit what ye desire

If it art what ye seek.”

 

 

 

                                Fetus~

                                                                                           

Author's Note

What say folks?

Reviews

[roarke]

I think there is a difference between critique and criticism.

You've chosen a huge theme here, and how does one go about describing it? Do words suffice? Ah, but that is the eternal challenge.

should we find words or should we describe vision? Should we stay undefined or stake pitons along the way to hold our perception anchored?

We all make choices and who has the right answers? Try writing different drafts and see which one speaks what you want to say.

[jazzkraft]

it is interesting, Festus.

[patricia]

I loved the voice tone used in this, kind of old english arthurian-ish. Maybe Merlin or some ancient pilgrim. The rythm was great and it flowed so well. Thanks.

[Manpreet]

A torrent of thoughts echoed

Through the ears of life,

To bare a bedlam of beatitude.

A violet volition of vain lust

Had subdued within forever.

A powerful thought expressed in these lines. Great going don't stop here!

[manifesto]

I love your reference to space in this poem as it gives the whole thing an ethereal feel. I get the feeling of someone organizing chaos, if that makes sense. Your diction is AWESOME. Keep writing!

Very thoughtful, and I felt like I was totally in your words. I do like the old spoken word play in this. Clear message, within, you write the opposites across eachother, and the reader may choise. I do like this a lot! mysterious, and brilliant.

[Bhavya Kaushik]

Irfan,
The poetic flow of this excerpt is effortless. Though, at times - I felt as if you are trying very hard to write this, and making it complex-ed ; When it shouldn't be. But, nevertheless, a great attempt. Very thoughtful!

[stellasautelle]

I love it, so well written. :)

[Wendy Seames Garner]

Again, I don't feel competent reviewing poetry, but it sounds like a prophecy to me. Do you just write poems or do you write stories as well? I felt like there should be a story to go along with the prophecy.

[Ron Gerald]

Seems to me a story of a monk who shows people his teenage life. I maybe be wrong but i guess poetry has different meanings for different people.
The flow was amazing and the narration was perfect. Great poem.

[Alexa Tasch]

Wow. Your vocabulary is great and it flows so well. It was very well written and I loved it