Numbness is Golden

A "damaged" person's perspective on life.

As the earth orbits the sun,
as new life is being formed every second,
as people meet and fall in love,
I stand upon a rocky terrain in life,thinking....

I think of my past,
wonder why everything that made me delirious had to happen so fast,

Thoughts of the future,
couldn't make me more insecure,
the desire to be pure once more,
has never been more apparent

For present day I saunter this world aimlessly,
and I've come to the conclusion that everything seems useless,
everyone seems as real as the fantasies one conjures under the influence,

As I close my eyes and gaze into my own world,
I see dreams of mine that were once alive and well,
but are now dead and broken.

Just as broken as the heart that lies in my chest,
the heart that cries for unconditional love,
the heart that is the victim of mockery by a spirit that has forsaken me.

As tears cascade down hollow brown eyes and onto a pale, white chest,
I've come to the realization that cries to be held and care for by someone unconditionally,
never deny nor harm me,
will ever be heard.

I glance into a mirror,
to see what I have become,
swollen eyes that are the courtesy of countless lies,
Charcoal colored lower eyelids that ultimately prove,
that I have failed at my greatest goal, and must resort to the next best thing,
numbness,
because I have come to a realization that where there is no basic emotion,
there is no risk of damage.

Reviews

[B Calvert]

thats amazing, so much raw emotion in a poem