Not a river

This writing is based on my current emotions and feelings of disappointment due to a relationship not going the direction I was hoping it would, and my attempt at coping with loneliness.

How do you drown in my air, how do you suffocate surrounded by all the oxygen you need
You find a way, you tempt the fates, you search for things meant to stay unseen
And at the end of the day, you sit and you wonder, how the hell are we still here?
Lounging, complaining, yet still and never changing
The opposite of rivers
That flow into streams
That touch so much beauty with each branch they breed

I’m the murky pond
That never stirs unless touched
Constantly aching, longing for more
Someone please hold me
Make me feel healthy
Show me those waters I’ve heard that they soar
I’ll sit here so sultry,
My silt never kicked up
Dirty and broken
How can water be broken?
I find a way, you find a way, the emptiness always comes to stay
The rains, they come
My hopes, they wash away
For something more, a larger dream
Someone to come and see me just for me
Look inside me, see their reflection
Glazed with adoration, see themselves back

But for now my waters stay murky, unclear
No one loving that brown milky sheer
That sits there on top, so plainly in view
Touch me stir me
I’ll wait here for you

Author's Note

I’m sorry if this seems kind of hectic. I just wrote it and basically just tried to go off my emotions and perspective at the moment.

Reviews

[willweb]

How can water be broken? What a questions. This line alone magnifies the feelings and emotions that have a choke hold on you. I know these feelings. I have spoken to myself out loud, asking questions in crowded rooms, with people staring at me not even knowing I am doing it. The emptiness hurts. Your poem expresses these feelings wonderfully.

[Mavis]

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review! I honestly wasn’t sure about that line, I felt that no one would really understand what it meant or how it felt, so it means a lot that you specifically pointed it out! I’m glad the meaning and emotions of my words came through to you. As for unknowingly speaking out loud, trust me that’s a habit I am all too familiar with.