"Elegance"

detruction of all good things feel similar

 A Connections not thorough so the image won’t show

Until the fuse gets replaced you’ll never know

What there is beyond the road making it so?

You cannot see what’s after the river

And just before the trees

Where it all began and where it all died

The place where she bled

Next to the spot where we cried

Somehow wires got hot crossed and a tube has blown

Consequently shards and razors were elegantly thrown

Reviews

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

You cannot see what's after the river
And just before the trees
Where it all began and where it all died -- great lines.

I like the juxtaposition of nature and something like electricity and fuses...it's a nice contrast that illicits a certain emotion. Some great imagery as well "Somehow wires got hot crossed and a tube has blown"--this is insanely unique and quite fantastic as an image. Overall, I really enjoyed this write.

[stephen dillon]

thanx i will check outyour work

[мalғy]

I like the way it put a mental image into my head, very beautiful written! I hope to see more of your writing very soon Stephen :)
A very beautiful piece!

[icelandicblue]

I love the lines that seem to be popular with everyone. I'm also curious trying to visualize those razors and shards elegantly thrown. I've missed your work and I hope that you are ok.

[stephen dillon]

i'm not doing so hot mentaly but i have 1 and 1/2 books plus a split in the works

[icelandicblue]

I think of you and your struggles. Bit you are being productive. I am happy for you. Stay strong steven

[Androglossia]

You cannot see what’s after the river; And just before the trees; Where it all began and where it all died


I loved these lines. You have a way with words and you're good at free verse. Keep it up and keep sharing.

[Brandon S. Whitten]

Excellent read and write

[CricketSong]

I enjoyed the rhythm of this piece as well as the imagery. Thank you for sharing.

[Em]

I really like the way you write. This is a beautiful poem. I LOVE when people rhyme, I think it makes for a pretty piece of work. You're great and I am looking forward to reading more of your work.

[stephen dillon]

thank you soo much i have been getting some pretty harsh reviews so this is very comforting hopefully we can collab later on if that is interesting to you

[stephen dillon]

should i do some spokenword?

[Wórdsmíth]

well, "Dillon", that's an wonderful write. you got me man. Nice flow of ink, words are powerful here.
well written

[Holly Mason]

what a wonderful piece of writing
I always enjoyed cinderblock but this is my favorite of yours
details throughout imagery that sparks nicely
thank you for sharing

[stephen dillon]

thanx alot i really appriciate it