lost soldier

 

 

 

I ask God as I pray

Why were there no heroes today
Bullets do not bounce off his chest

That is why he wore a vest

But it could not stop all
So today another falls

He was only trying to do what was right

Never actually looking for a fight

Today we bury my son

Just another in a war we couldn’t have won

Reviews

[Alicia Isabella Lane]

Ok this is the second poem of yours today that made me cry, if you keep this up it's going to become a problem lol, but seriously though this was such a touching poem! I have yet to read a poem of yours I haven't absolutly loved. Keep up the great work and have an awesome tallent for writing.

[~crazy Beautiful~]

powerful, intense writing
the last tow lines were jam packed with a blow to the soul
Every day families are seperated due to war and the casualties of it, it is often the most difficult subjects to write about.
Nice work
thank you for entering my contest

[J. Hampton]

A powerful write ....
The weight of your loss and the burden your words put upon each an every one of us ...
is so felt. Your son ...IS a hero eternally.
All those who sign on to defend millions they'll never meet against enemies that are not initially their own...
go beyond heroes ....

We as a people must not be so quick to give a nod to every endevor of war....
the price is too high ! If we do not agree with the involvement....pray for each soldier regarless...why ? ....because they are there !!!

Peace

Blesssssssssss

[Melanie Jane Boicourt S..]

I read this before but I did not review it because it was in my contest. Now that the contest is over I can tell you that I loved it. Congratulations. Thank you for sharing.
Love all, Mejasha

[PhoeniX]

heart stricken and painful loss. a poem that went straight to my soul.

[A.r. Bazian]

May he Rest In Peace!
i'm very sorry for your loss!
talent, diction, and emotion! its perfect... one disagreement... but its personal... so overall.... great poem!
i like it!

nice poem! keep it up
love and respect

[Raef C. Boylan]

This is a brutally simple piece: a parent's lament, which is emotively effective because of the tone of bewilderment and sorrow:
"Why were their no heroes today
bullets do not bounce off his chest
That is why he wore a vest".

A nice piece, you've done a good job with the rhyming structure too - although "right" and "fight" are very overused in poetry couplets.

In terms of this contest, I'm not sure what you're protesting: the war itself because it's useless?

Thanks for entering.

p.s.
"Why were their no heroes today" (their = there?)
"bullets do not bounce off his chest" (uppercase 'B' in "bullets"?)
"so today another falls" (uppercase 'S' in "so"?)