No Future

A lady spends her time closed off from the world loving someone that is gone.

 

She takes refuge in her house, shielding

herself from the present time.

Trapped in the past where love felt so good.

To come back to the present time she would

have to admit it's over.

 

The solitude is not peaceful, but suffocating.

Memories of him looms in her tired mind.

The thoughts she ponders assail her,

getting her no where.

 

He left her six months ago, needing space to breathe.

His vacancy from her life left her feeling empty and defeated.

Her world had caved around her when he left.

 

Sticks and stones can break bones,

but words can never be taken back.

His words had been like a stone,

knocking her off her feet,

breaking her like humpty dumpty.

 

She watched as life went on without her.

With  trembling hands she lit the logs

in the fireplace.

Each love letter she read, then watched as

they burned to ashes.

 

Breathing became lighter.

Life was to be lived.

She was ready to relinquish the past,

and move back into the present,

and look forward to the future.

She realized there was no future in the past.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

Worked on this for two days, hope you like it! please tell me what you think!

Reviews

[Ron]

Really nice, nice work. Imaginative with a good regenerative theme. Line 3 verse 2 should read "she ponders assail her." Also "took" / "taken." (Verse 4) (Breaking!) These are small errors. This is very good work that twangs the reader's emotions. Keep it up.

[Coyote Poetry]

A very good poem. I was always foolish. I kept my letters of love. Today I'm glad I did. The words of the past make me write today. I like the story and the ending. Burning memories can stop them for a time. I like the ending. We must get up and fight again. A outstanding poem.
Coyote

[Jibey]

A telling tale of emotional retreat

I don't thin you meant re-fudge! Try refuge instead!

[Cynthia]

Nice work!

[Robin]

nice, keep looking and moving forward ~

You capture the emotions well in this poem. Different lengths of the stanzas and the occasional rhyme add a chaotic feel to match the girl's emotions. Nicely done.

[Dark Empress]

Really nice. I enjoyed this. Great write, keep it up. Thanks for sharing.

[Kimberly]

I like the theme of this and the emotion. It's very well written. My only criticism, and it's not really a criticism, is to see if you could write the same 'story' using metaphor to 'show' instead of 'telling.' You don't have to change a word of your poem, I mention it more as a writing exercise than anything else.

[Frank F. Atanacio]

a very well written piece Love it

[Dream Slave]

Very good piece here. We can never move onto the future, unless we accept that the past is just that. Look forward and try to build what you have always wanted... not go back and fix something you never had.