constellations

constellations

A Poem by Shapirta
"

a poem on the constellations

"
Let's watch the constellations
each with their own correlations
with great consternation
with the concentration,
of an entire nation

© 2014 Shapirta


Author's Note

Shapirta
what do you think?

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Reviews

I think it's simply effulgent! Impeccable! Beautiful try Amy.. :)

Posted 10 Years Ago


I like this and its rhyme,, but I feel it would be better if it were little longer,
a good write here

Posted 10 Years Ago


Nicely done. I think most would find the constellations to be fascinating.

Posted 10 Years Ago


A very fun write. As a nation we do watch space. Imagination dwells there.

Posted 10 Years Ago


I really like this, Shapirta - I do believe you can do much more with this and make it a little longer, your vision in this poem has potential. But it is wonderful! Thank you for sharing!
-Jess

Posted 10 Years Ago


I love the rhyme of this piece! I think you did a really nice job with it... :))

Posted 10 Years Ago


Fantastic word play and rhyme in here. This would be a great way to warm up your speech before a show too since it requires diction so that you don't get tongue tied.

Posted 10 Years Ago


Shapirta

10 Years Ago

wait, try to say THAT ten times fast
Ashira Macy

10 Years Ago

Haha that one isn't too tricky.
Shapirta

10 Years Ago

well, twists my tongue!
I like how you took a simple sounding idea and transformed it into a more complex one. You are really good at rhyming. I feel like there is more to the story (or poem) than just these five lines. Maybe you can expand them a little bit more? If you chose to do that then I think you should keep these lines but have them italicized and still be the first stanza in the poem. It could be the introduction to a more in-depth look at the constellations. Good job! :)

Posted 10 Years Ago


Nice tongue twister. When you looked up on clear nights in Afghanistan it was like you never knew there were that many stars in the sky

Posted 10 Years Ago



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364 Views
9 Reviews
Rating
Added on September 23, 2014
Last Updated on September 23, 2014
Tags: stars, poem

Author

Shapirta
Shapirta

dude hi!, NY



About
i recently turned eleven, and for as long as i can remember, have always loved writing. haha wow. now im 12. time flies.. more..

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A Poem by Shapirta



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