I Hate You Because I Miss You

Hurting because you're still not over the breakup but your ex is.

So, 

I guess you're over me. 

A month and a half was all it took. 

It was that easy to let go of the love

You said you had for me. 

It was that easy to walk away.

It's that easy to look me in the face and not miss me. 

It's that easy to see me and not feel a tiny throb of pain...

Well,

It's not easy for me. 

I've talked to you some,

I've realized that I really do miss all the good things. 

I miss the physical things. 

When I think about the way you used to hold me,

My heart aches. 

Regardless of everything that you've done. 

Your actions would always show me how much you really cared.

I miss having that. 

I miss being so content and happy in your arms.

I miss the way you used to gently rub my sides as I lay next to you,

Overjoyed to be beside you.

I never thought it would hurt so freaking much.

I never thought our problems would be so bad.

You asked me not to hate you,

And I promised not to,

But I want to. 

I want to hate you for taking all of that away from me. 

I want to hate you for not saying hi to me after asking to be friends. 

I want to hate you for saying that you have no interest

In that puzzle you let me borrow the last time I went to your house.

I want to hate you 10 times over for leaving it on the floor,

Undone,

And in pieces.

Just like the memory of that day. 

Most of all,

I want to hate you because I still miss you,

Though it's completely clear that you don't miss me. 

I want to hate you for that too...

Hate is such a strong word though,

And I can't hate someone 

That I used to care so much for. 

Someone that I said I loved,

Someone that I would've done anything for. 

It's unorthodox. 

I just wish, I could see you in a different light.

So that every time I hear your name,

I don't think about the warmth from your body as you hold me.

I don't want to think about that anymore!

I just want to stop hurting. 

I just want to stop liking you since we've decided that we don't 

Belong together. 

I just want to stop noticing you.

I just want to hate you,

Because I miss you.