Vanity

A tale about seeking the Fountain of Youth. Or a metaphor for life. Whichever.

The desert dry is chaffing

Air rattling in my lungs

Ev’ry breath an ill whisper

Palms groping for the sun

 

Legends swept across the land

Seeking one to listen

Snaking up my leathered neck

Upon my ears they christened

 

Sirens gentle sobbed their tales

Moaning through the water

Chills of immortality

And the children fathered

 

Pressing through the blist’ring wind

Crying out for favor

My flesh flayed to nearly bone;

Ahead I glimpse savior

 

Promises of youth ripple

And my dead crawl hastens

Greed wraps claws around my neck

To plunge my head within

 

I suck the water eager

Destroying dreams and plans

The fountain I have died for

Is nothing but the sand

Author's Note

Don't hold back, tell me what you really think.

Reviews

[Tony]

Wow, I got to get me a glass of water. Really I feel thirsty.
Love the final stanza and it's allusion towards an oasis--
that makes the poem all the more lifelike
And goes well with the fountain of youth concept as well.
Thought provoking work. Dying for that fountain--
drinking our hallucinations or illusion of death.
Powerful metaphors here. Outstanding work!

[Matthew Krymov]

Liked It.

[Victoria Scott]

Hey! Your poem vanity is really really good and it has a chance of being one or the winners in the contest "Anything Random" but the specifications on this contest says that you have to be a member of the group to participate. So unless you become a member your piece will be disqualified. It is a very good poem though :D

[Sourav]

I especially liked the last stanza. Great way to end the poem. Overall it's well written poem :)

[Crow]

Excellent flow, rhythm, and imagery...you are quite gifted.

[Khaaki]

the words just flow beautifully.. nyc 1...

[J.S. Pua]

wow..

[melissa]

wow this was great i loved it. the detail was wonderful:)

[Orlando Murcia]

I thought this was great!!

That's what I think

Great write


Seriously great write

[Nancy Lee Shrader]

Congrats on your great winning poem!