Dearest

Dearest
by D. Huesmann

How precious
your beautiful mind
complex and crystalline
iridescent; jaded

Genuine smile
to your mouth
aching sweetness
tugs at my heartstrings

as a baby might
tug at Daddy’s
littlest finger
blinded by love

You smile and
the moonlight warms
yet sadness in your eyes
draws blue skies bleak

You whisper
the insignificance
of tender life
and the downward spiral

bitter on the tongue
of earthly burial
why waste effort
if breathing stops anyway?

Even at your darkest
this sensation burrowed where
my quickening heart
throbs in sweet agony

Forget the labels
remember the satin
cocooning my body
and sluicing your flesh

Slide against me
so I feel that excitement
of course I’ll touch you
to earn that smile

Relax, dearest
there is no pedestal
I find your imperfections
achingly endearing

Wishing you cared,
—because I love you

Reviews

[Travis Lawrence]

"Relax, dearest
there is no pedestal
I find your imperfections
achingly endearing"

Terrific stanza, and a nice poem! Not a big fan of the semi-colon in the fourth line, though.

"tugs on my heartstrings"
"blinded by love"
"quickening heart / throbs"
-- These stand out as cliche to me. Replace "heartstrings" and "love" and "throbs", and the lines are fine, I think a more original twist on these classic statements would add more to the poem.

"yet sadness in your eyes
draws blue skies bleak"
"bitter on the tongue
of earthly burial"
"remember the satin
cocooning my body
and sluicing your flesh"
-- These lines I especially enjoyed, they are original and clever, and read strong. I think you meant "slicing" though?

All in all a good write, I enjoyed it, thank you for entering my contest!

[SM Davis]

You smile and
the moonlight warms
yet sadness in your eyes
draws blue skies bleak

yes! when we look into the eyes of the one we love...prudence demands we walk away yet the heart will remain ... for what seems an eternity. Very well written...LOVED IT!

[Adventerous Amy]

^ ^
O O
__

i love it!!

[Lillian]

I LOVE THIS ONE! Oh, how I would love someone to write this for me. haha Well done! Kudos!

[Christopher 'Windstorm'..]

how beautiful are the ways in which you see love for thy self,lingering untouchedand enduring to your soft touch! beautiful and interaguing well written and a excellent read

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

This is great.. sounds like loving a goth girl.. i am kidding .. we all have dark sides and moods..
i love your style .. a beautiful poem of love and why the person is loved..

Chloe
xoxo

[Angel Bird]

Wow - great read! Big impact! Deep feelings evolving from your words. An undemanding but pure love to and for a soul drifting in deep depression. Thought provoking. Great work.