The Intruder

How is it that the universe expands
and I cannot diminish thoughts of you?
Your memory should be cold now
instead it scorches and burns

melting the edges of my existence
until sleep eludes my grasp
and I chew on my lip, surprised
that blood tastes more of salt than copper.

Pain travels from twilight into blinding brightness.
There is no impenetrable shell, no leaden wall,
only the will to cauterize its oppressive nature
and banish it into the shadowed recesses of being.

Reviews

[Pryde Foltz]

Pain travels from twilight into blinding brightness.
There is no impenetrable shell, no leaden wall,
only the will to cauterize its oppressive nature
and banish it into the shadowed recesses of being.

I am somewhat speechless here. The poem is extraordinary and for me very relatable. I have one of these:)

[icelandicblue]

Thank you Pryde. There are some things that stay with you like ghosts.

[AprilRN1210]

I have had to sit here and read this a few times.. First read my mind is lost to the emotion, dragging me down into this feeling of wanting to be free, chains digging into my heart, burning the edges of my soul.. Second read- my mind was tickled with such stunning and brilliant phrasing that creates such vivid imagery. The flow was captivating and allowed the reader to get lost in the overwhelming emotion. The clever title and the thought-provoking start grabs the attention and doesn't let go.. another amazing write.. powerful stuff!

[icelandicblue]

Thank you April. I am happy that the poem drew you in and held you there a moment. There are many things and people who intrude upon our solitude. Thanks again.

[AprilRN1210]

you're welcome. It was my pleasure. It is weird how some things and people stick.. not sure how they got there, but sure as the heck don't want em there..

[Rita L. Sev]

A poem that will be deeply felt by anyone who knows the pain of loss, Blue. Raw, and perfectly expressed.

[icelandicblue]

Thank you Rita.

[Baby Ricochet]

Wow! This is one heavy emotional poem. Excellent job blue.

[icelandicblue]

Thanks Baby...wouldn't be one of mine if it wasn't weighty. I really want to write light romantic pieces, it looks so beautiful and comforting, but I don't seem to be able to delve into that part of my psyche very often. Thanks again.

[s y e]

This one hits my heart Anne... Your emotion is so evident in this poem, it is so raw. A poignant poem written so beautifully.

[icelandicblue]

Thanks Noodle...you are a doll.

[Valentine]

This hits the heart of me and reminds me of how I feel after losing my husband. Love hurts when God takes one so far away. Nice write. Valentine

[icelandicblue]

Thank you so much Valentine. I am sorry for your loss.

[The Black Warrior]

This beautifully written, with such a deep passion/emotion. I love your choice of words! I truly love this! :D

[icelandicblue]

Thank you and nice to meet you.

[The Black Warrior]

You're very welcome, and is my pleasure to meet you! :D

[Bright Ocean Star]

Try as you might, the harder you push thoughts down and away, they spring up at you twice as fast. Human will be damned with the heart involved. Beautiful, powerful write, my productive friend...

[icelandicblue]

Thank you so much. I appreciate your frequent visits!

[Bright Ocean Star]

I can't help it. You keep writing beautiful work. I'm like a little girl in a candy shop. Everything I see is so sweet and good, I can't help but come back. I'm very happy you accepted my friendship. And you are so kind as to drop in to read mine, too.

[Einstein Noodle]

wow! well said .. i can so relate .. it can take forever to ease the pain of loosing after loving so greatly .. puts me in touch with my own long ago loss .. its like an anchor on a very long chain .. the boat can drift about quite a bit but never quite sail in a desired direction .. you got me going with this one girl! nice job!
E.

[icelandicblue]

It is like an anchor that is such an apt description. Thanks for reading and commenting.

[Matching Socks]

This is one of my favourites of yours. Love the way you've likened the memory of is person to an intruder.
Sometimes these ghosts are hard to shake. In fact we never do. That line about the lip... Loved it!

[icelandicblue]

Thank you again. Sometimes memories and thoughts are just like intruders and they won't go away. I appreciate your thoughts.

[Confuser]

OOPs, what a great write. I tried to copy some lines/couldn't/changed browser, so let me write, wow; I see it below:
Pain travels from twilight into blinding, brightest,
There is no impenetrable shell, no leaden wall,
only the will (wow) to cauterize its oppressive nature
and banish it into the shadowed recesses of being......quite beautiful and powerful. Thank you!

[icelandicblue]

Thanks so much Confuser. I appreciate your comment.

[Confuser]

Wow, great writing. I'm just pitteling along...could never get this far. Thank you..............