In This Place

Life's scalpel has taken a sagittal slice
of time and thrown it upon hewn logs
to crackle and smoke in heated whorls.

The present never really is
swallowed too quickly by the was
dessicated and fleeting beneath my feet.

Death is not the culprit nor an innocent.
It is in the fading that the shading becomes
more pronounced, greedy and flagrant.

How unaware I was of each breath
and the rioting of my heartbeat quieting,
ignorant of life ebbing away too swiftly.

But in the end the bleeding comes too slowly
finally turning to ash sprinkled upon the ground
where sorrow and worry will never find me

in this place


that I hide.

Reviews

[Einstein Noodle]

beautiful! just sublime and beautiful .. "Death is not the culprit nor an innocent." we run through our youth at such a fast pace .. never paying attention to the "now" .. always its the bits of past and future that preoccupy .. when older and we slow enough to notice time as relative and an illusion .. we are slipping away .. such thoughts your poem has inspired in my little noodle today .. turning me to a thankful place .. we don't talk about death enough in my opinion .. putting this one im my library :)
E.

[icelandicblue]

It goes by too fast and then at times not fast enough. How much of our lives have we wished away? It is always a pleasure when you comment on one of my poems. Thank you.

[Cryingkate]

In less then 5 minutes I went from bubbling bright to dark regret.. phew what a ride thru the tunnel.
The emotions scream loudly here and I wanted to run away and back to joy from where I came.
I couldn't because it is speaking truth and more truth then I wanted to believe.

Excellence !

[icelandicblue]

I can be a downer for sure. Sometimes I just like to hide from sorrow and pain or at least I dream of it. Thank you again for gracing my page.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Oh my, you really hit the reader with such mind stimulating emotions, so much to ponder in your verses…

I was particularly intrigued by these lines…

Death is not the culprit nor an innocent.
It is in the fading that the shading becomes
more pronounced, greedy and flagrant.

[icelandicblue]

Thanks for dropping in and commenting. It is always appreciated.

[The Rock And Roll Cowboy(REBEL WITH A CAUSE)]

You ar welcome, it is always a pleasure.

[AprilRN1210]

what a deep, profound, piece.. It is sneaky-- in that it distracts with such rich imagery, stimulating the mind with thought-provoking truths discovered while reflecting and digging, and then whacks you over the head with emotion at the end... Triple threat knock-out right here.. wheeew.. will have to come back and read this one again... favorites for sure:)

[icelandicblue]

Wow thank you so much April. Your review had me looking at this poem through a different lens!

[AprilRN1210]

you're welcome, it was my pleasure:)

[The Hampstead Poet]

This poem is very eloquent, and your words are so well chosen. Many share the distant dream of being able to escape life, the passing of time and death, but as your poem shows, perhaps that is not a happy place. Yet still, it is human nature to cling to life with every fiber of our being. Very well written, you make an interesting point, and I very much enjoyed reading this piece. Thank you.

[icelandicblue]

Thank you so much for your kind review. I can't figure out if the poem is melancholic tinged with hope or hope tinged with melancholia.

[B.J]

Wow, such great words, taking a slice of life and putting it all into perspective. Each verse is so powerful

[icelandicblue]

Thank you for your kind words.

[B.J]

You're welcome

[MsJewel]

Wow...love this.
But in the end the bleeding comes too slowly
finally turning to ash sprinkled upon the ground
where sorrow and worry will never find me
in this place
that I hide
Amazing poem and the ending gave me goosebumps!

:) Julie

[icelandicblue]

Thanks so much Julie. It's good to see you.

[Pryde Foltz]

Death is not the culprit nor an innocent.
It is in the fading that the shading becomes
more pronounced, greedy and flagrant.

A chance a renewal perhaps … I could eat this poem up, Anne. Loved it.

[icelandicblue]

Thank you so much Pryde. You chose my favorite stanza. I appreciate your very kind review and I am thrilled you like the poem.

[Lyn Anderson]

This is amazing. I am glad I picked up on it in the feed. I love the cut of sagittal slice. Sometimes we hide because we have to.

[icelandicblue]

I truly appreciate your review. I am pleased that you liked this.

[Lyn Anderson]

It is a great piece.

[Frieda P]

Life has a wicked sense of humor no doubt, cuts like a scalpel indeed, and not with precision cuts either, it's those jagged edges that make us bleed the most and make us scream bloody murder...hiding with.

[icelandicblue]

Probably a bit of both I think. Thanks Frieda!