Safe Harbor (Haiku)

Salt spray fills the air
we cut through the wild whitecaps
toward the white boned sand.

Reviews

[Clockwork]

I like the movement that you capture in this one. The sound of your words, combines with the idea of cutting through the whitecaps, creates the thought of running back to the shore without having to use that word. I like tour alliteration with the "wild whitecaps" in the second line of this one. Great Haiku to capture a moment of summer fun.

[icelandicblue]

Hi Clockwork,

Thank you so much for your kind comment.

[Clockwork]

You're welcome :-)

[redflutterby]

Love this Anne!! Fantastic haiku...;-)

[icelandicblue]

Thank you kindly Red.

[Traci]

I really like the imagery and your choice of words in this one. Great haiku to capture the essence of summer fun, and a moment of tranquility. We all need more of these special times :)

[icelandicblue]

I do happen to like this one myself. Thank you so much.

[Samuel Pennell]

Amazing, man. Amazing. You should do more haikus.

[icelandicblue]

Thanks, haikus are how I started writing poetry. I feel they are my poetic roots and perhaps I will write more.

[Samuel Pennell]

Sounds good! I didn't know you were on right now. I sent you a friend request/message. But anyways, like I said in my request, you should check out my piece, "Black is the Devil and Evil is the Sun" if you get the chance. Some of our writing seems to be in the same genre, with its dramatic language.

http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/samspennell/1221824/

[icelandicblue]

I most certainly will.

[Marie]

Beautiful imaage of ocean and sand....

[icelandicblue]

Thanks Marie.

[Melanie Genevieve]

creates a great image in so few lines. I love summer. This makes me wanna run to the beach right now

[icelandicblue]

Gotta love the beach, thanks.

[s y e]

This is lovely, Blue - written beautifully in only a few lines.

[icelandicblue]

Thanks so much Noodle!

[Jack...]

Beautiful Anne, it seems we all may be going to belize before long.

[icelandicblue]

Sounds good to me Jack. Thanks.

[Friday]

Beautiful writing. I'm unable to count 5-7-5 though. Maybe it's just me being stupid or maybe your poem is more elaborate than the western form.

[icelandicblue]

Thanks for your comment. I just did a recount and I found 5-7-5- although you are right- that format is a western artifice. The haiku should only take one breath to repeat. Thanks again.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

A beautiful haiku... The ocean imagery is always my favorite, because for some reason it gives a sense of freedom and clarity. I, as Christian pointed out, also enjoyed the "movement" of "cutting through" the ocean and heading toward a "white boned" shore. Those images were so start and real. Stunning write, my friend. I felt the salt spray and the motion of the vessel.

[icelandicblue]

Thank you so much Sarah,

I am pleased that you felt this one.