Broken Feet

To count feet jurassically

‘Tis to rhyme most classically

stress and unstress I’ve been told

keeping time your rhyme unfolds

See the lopping off of words

forced to fit with image blurred

follows such a rule so strict

losing meaning, over picked

Were I to attempt this feat

join the club of those elite

egos large and overblown

beg forgiveness and atone

Yet again I think not

let them think that I’ve got squat

imagery is what I bleed

and with that I shall proceed

Writing from the outside in

taking barbs across the chin

won’t be turning black and blue

to that crowd I say screw you!

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i love this poem..

screw the critics ----

and form???? good grief...sometimes words are so stuffed uncomfortably into a poem to keep with the form...that the meanings and heart of the poem is non-existent..

writing from the gut and heart...whether it rhymes or not...follows form or not...whatever it does...the voice wants to be individual..not what everyone else expects..

bravo to the words you have written here.

jacob

[icelandicblue]

Why I thank you. I agree that those lopped off words are so artificial that the poem has no heart.

[stephen dillon]

the subject ofc this piece is almost liken to my own poem "thin lips" check it out and see if you think so, also
To count feet jurassically

‘Tis to rhyme most classically

stress and unstress I’ve been told

keeping time your rhyme unfolds




See the lopping off of words

forced to fit with image blurred

follows such a rule so strict

losing meaning, over picked
is just comepletly flawlwss i am a huge fan of yours do you have any books?

[icelandicblue]

Thanks so much stephen. I really appreciate your enthusiasm about my poetry. I don't have any books and I've never been published. I write because I have to put my thoughts down; it's my way of making sense of the world. Again, thank you.

[stephen dillon]

read thin lips by me it's kind of about the same topic

[icelandicblue]

I will go and do that now!

[Circe]

you have said what you wanted and in doing so created a wonderfully structured poem, at least to my eyes, the rhymes are delightfully clever... your lines are highly original. makes me smile. keep being you and writing the way you want!

[icelandicblue]

Thanks a lot. It's nice to be read. I am happy that it made you smile.

[lee von cleef]

Some of "them" have had the prosthetic so long they think in song,sweet harts beet to the flaps of the loon as it glides along....I guess my Gran told me Best:
Like the poor benighted Hindu
Who had no clothes
So he had to make
His skin do.

[icelandicblue]

LOL- You are funny. Thanks for commenting and reading.

[Jack...]

Always be yourself, no matter what. Who cares what others say, unless of course the criticism is constructive. I too hear a lot of negative stuff about what I write, but you know what, I don't care. Everyone has their own opinion, so that's the way it is. Just keep being yourself, write what you like and enjoy what you do...you are very good at it.

[icelandicblue]

You've got to dance to your own drummer. Those of us who write do it because we love it, we are compelled and called. We can't be pigeonholed. Thanks Jack.

[icelandicblue]

So well said!!!

"Were I to attempt this feat
join the club of those elite
egos large and overblown
beg forgiveness and atone"

I couldn't say it better myself,
assumptions, and people who think
They know you, are the worst.

A nice pun of poetic brilliance here.
Thank you, I like your tongue!

- Elisa

[icelandicblue]

Thanks so much for reading and for your thoughtful comment.

It is my pleasure :D

[R. L. Ives]

Very nicely said.

Like I mentioned to another writer earlier, you have to be your own writer and to hell with those that will nit pick and judge your work to death. If it says what you want it to say that's all that really matters. After all, it's your heart and soul telling the story.

[icelandicblue]

I look forward to your comments! To thine own self be true.

[R. L. Ives]

I look forward to reading your work.

Absolutely 100% my dear. My life-long friend has said that to me many a time,
over the years.

[quinfinn]

couldn't have said it better myself. i absolutely approve and love.....this is a wonderful reminder to those who would judge others that they are nothing more than pompous asses! well done!

[icelandicblue]

Thanks quinfinn, I was really mad when I wrote this, totally insulted in fact. Now I find it quite amusing that I cared so much considering the source. I appreciate your approval. : )

[quinfinn]

no problem, happy to acknowledge your efforts!