Hi
Great work by the way to get this out in the way you did. It would have been great having an authors note so as to know something more. It seems this person wishes to be translucent and almost not be visible. I can so relate to this on some level. But I don't think I can honestly say, I have suffered from pistanthrophobia.
I did a little edit suggestion as It might make your poem read smoother. three things:
1. Caps i'm to I'm.
2. added is to "my future is destroyed."
3. broke to poem into verses.
Blessings
El
I can't talk to anyone,
no I'm not dumb.
I can't feel anything,
no I'm not numb.
I don't wave a "Hi",
I never say goodbye.
I can't let my eyes contact,
I don't want to look pretty,
I just want to know new facts.
Because I can't let this happen again to me,
my past speaks for me,
my present doesn't exist,
furthermore, my future is destroyed.
I'm afraid of trusting people,
I have pistanthrophobia.
It doesn't matter now,
they killed my soul,
only my body lives.
I had never heard of this fear before reading this poem, but you have expressed it well. The first four lines are particularly relatable for me - they sound like having an internal battle with oneself, struggling between different self-perceptions or different "voices" in one's head. The final two lines are also extremely powerful and rather gut-wrenching. They drive home the true impact that this kind of fear has on a person. Nice work!
"Pistanthrophobia is the fear of trusting people due to bad experiences with prior lovers. It's such a natural response to being hurt, but if you want to be in a happy, healthy relationship again, then you need to overcome it." -
Quick google search. Note the final line. "YOU need to OVERCOME IT."